SCP-15000-J
rating: +35+x

Item #: SCP-15000-J

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures: SCP-15000-J is to be contained in a humanoid containment chamber and given new anomalous impossible puzzles every five hours to maintain its interest in the Foundation, preventing a containment breach.

Description: SCP-15000-J is a human male that possess anomalous deductive skills. SCP-15000-J can deduce information about an entity from small details such as the way they eat, how they look, the way they bumped their toe, or how fast they speak. This deduction of information ranges to personal secrets, thoughts, or what they will do in the future that has upwards of being 99.99% accurate.

SCP-15000-J was discovered participating in an anomalous rock paper scissors game, where it beat all the other competitors in a single battle royal round. When asked why it participated it said, "A simple mind warm-up to get the blood flowing." SCP-15000-J then willingly went into Foundation custody stating "Change of scenery would be good for the mind."

Addendum.Interview Logs:

Interviewer: Doctor Georgia Penelope

Interviewee: SCP-15000-J

Foreword: Interview #1.

[BEGIN LOG]

Dr. Penelope: Good morning SCP-15000-J, today I would like to ask you a few questions, I hope that's okay with you.

SCP-15000-J: [Chuckling] Of course, but before we begin, how was your Butterfingers with your McNuggets last night?

Dr. Penelope: How… How do you know about that?

SCP-15000-J: It was simple, you have five stains on your coat, but I didn't smell anything in your breath indicating you ate breakfast.

Dr. Penelope: Now that is some bullshi—

SCP-15000-J: Tch tch tch, so quick to anger, but now, I know everything about your personality! You're the type to hate your position in society!

Dr. Penelope: That's a mere generalization.

SCP-15000-J: But is it? This morning you… You were forced to get your inconsiderate boss some coffee after you bumped your head on a door. You were probably thinking "Why do I have to get this moron some coffee, I should be in charge."

Dr. Penelope: That's… That is not true.

SCP-15000-J: But it is, this morning while you fixed him coffee you spit in it!

Head Research Campe: She did what?

SCP-15000-J: But that wasn't your first time, you did this several times, you even did [DATA EXPUNGED].

Dr. Penelope: He's lying, don't believe a word he says!

SCP-15000-J: Look on your cameras then, Doctor Campe!

Dr. Penelope: Wha—Wha—Wha—

Head Research Campe: Doctor Penelope, come in my office right now.

[END LOG]

Interviewer: Doctor Fabrizio Samuel

Interviewee: SCP-15000-J

Foreword: Interview #2.

[BEGIN LOG]

Dr. Samuel: Hello SCP-15000-J, I would like to ask why did you um… expose D— Junior Researcher Penelope.

SCP-15000-J: Expose, is that what you call it? I didn't expose anyone, that was just simple mental exercise.

Dr. Samuel: A exercise for what?

SCP-15000-J: [Looking up]… Until the time I reach the pinnacle of the one above all.

Dr. Samuel: Could you please elaborate?

SCP-15000-J: Elaborate, why should I? What are you tr… Hehe, I see now.

Dr. Samuel: You see what?

SCP-15000-J: You're not a doctor, you're a spy!

Dr. Samuel: [Stands up] This is getting ridiculous, can we en—

SCP-15000-J: Why are you leaving so early, Chaos Insurgency?

Spy: How do you know about that?

SCP-15000-J: It was simple, this organization must have enemies, I watch too much tv not to know that and while you were in here you didn't write down notes immediately, you waited five seconds do it!

Spy: But how did you come up with a name?

SCP-15000-J: SCP Foundation has 13 letters and this is my second interview, so 2 plus 13 equals 15 and what has 15 letters, Chaos Insurgency.

You see, I trained my mind for five years on a specific mountain in a specific region to increase my mental power. On that mountain, I had learned the art of seeing with your eyes. With this power, I could deduce anything about you by just the way you walk. But of course, not anyone can use this power, only the wisest and greatest of minds could dre—

Spy: … No, no that just makes no sense, our names could have been The Red Nudists. You guys see this right? This is some cra—[Is rendered unconscious by security guards.]

Head Researcher Campe: If you keep this up, we might have to give you a job.

SCP-15000-J: No need, a person would not lie if the truth did not feel dangerous.

[END LOG]

Interviewer: Doctor Abbot Daniel.

Interviewee: SCP-15000-J

Foreword: Interview #6. Doctor Abbot Daniel submitted forty-five complaints against SCP-15000-J stating that is exposing 'secrets' of personnel that it interacts with, subsequently decreasing site morale, and it was not anomalous. They were granted an interview with SCP-15000-J to prove this statement.

[BEGIN LOG]

Dr. Daniel: Good morning SCP-15000-J, how are you feeling?

SCP-15000-J: Quite we—

Dr. Daniel: [Slams several photos of SCP-15000-J working in walmart] Explain this.

SCP-15000-J: Clearly, that is me working in WalMart.

Dr. Daniel: Yeah, but you said 10 years ago you went to the 'mountain' to train. But, the time doesn't match up; here you are, 10 years ago, working in WalMart.

SCP-15000-J: Your point?

Dr. Daniel: You're not anomalous, you're just a toothpick con man! You didn't train with wizards, monks, or hillbillies, you're just good at… doing things; and so, you don't belong here and you need to be amnestized immediately!

SCP-15000-J: [Laughing under its breath]

Dr. Daniel: [Sweating] What's so funny?

SCP-15000-J: You see, Doctor Abbot Daniel, I was the one who made those fake pictures!

Dr. Daniel: That's impossible, these were discovered under high tec—

SCP-15000-J: Hush child, I deduced that this will happen 10 years ago when I was training on that mountain. I knew my abilities would be so great that there would be haters coming after me. So I made fake pictures that prove to my haters that I was wrong and they were right, but in reality, they would be proving that I was right and they were wrong.

To answer your question that was the reason for my laughter.

Dr. Daniel: [Laughing under his breath]

SCP-15000-J: Hm, what's so funny?

Dr. Daniel: You see SCP-15000-J, I made those photos today!

SCP-15000-J gasps and stumbles back.

SCP-15000-J: That just can't be, I… I deduced it.

Dr. Daniel: You deduced nothing but your own downfall!

SCP-15000-J: Hehe, but you see I went into the mountain dew section, so a mountain nonetheless.

Dr. Daniel: … No! We are all tired of your deduction, you just want to fuck with people, and we are through with you.

Two Junior Researchers embarrassed by SCP-15000-J walks in the room and hold down SCP-15000-J.

SCP-15000-J: Get your hands off me! [Dr. Daniel takes out a needle and injects it within SCP-15000-J.]

SCP-15000-J: I see, hehe. So this is the end of my legacy… For now that i— [Is rendered unconscious with a punch from Dr. Daniel.]

[END LOG]

Closing Statement: SCP-15000-J is now put under constant sedation to study its true anomalous ability and increase site morale.

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