News for April 2017

Welcome to this installment of site news, where we celebrate "spring"!

This is a series showing off news from the site, articles from the past month1, and fan-content for you to check out and discover! Be sure to leave a comment with your thoughts!

On-Site News

Featured Articles

  • The featured articles for April were SCP-2135 ("91st Street Station") by ObserverSeptemberObserverSeptember and Funerals are Fun by WrongJohnSilverWrongJohnSilver. One's about a mysterious train station hidden under Manhattan, and the other's about how reality TV can prevent cicada infestations. Check them out!
  • The featured articles for March were SCP-2870 ("General Malaise") by BryxBryx and Four Seconds, Low Pitched by ksaidksaid. One's about a literally diseased society, and the other's about trying to live normally in a town that's anything but. Check them out!

Event-Featured Articles

The theme for the month of April was gravity!

  • In SCP-1506 ("Aerial Arachnid"), by DrMrTheMinotaurDrMrTheMinotaur, the Foundation fought flying spiders…
  • In SCP-858 ("Gravity's Rainbow"), by LowellLowell, the sky stopped becoming the limit…
  • And in SCP-2597 ("Minus Two Kilograms"), by GeometryPrimeGeometryPrime, it actually became easier to lift two tons than minus two kilos…

Rest of the News

  • Series IV is open for business! Get posting in those 3XXX slots - Series V awaits!

Missing out on articles? Enjoy a recap on the articles from the past month.

Week of April 1st:

The joke's on you for thinking I'd have something funnier to write here.


  • SCP-2566 ("Demurrage") - In the town of Timothy, Nebraska, the love of money is not the root of all evil. Backed by UnivineUnivine.
  • SCP-2873 ("The Power of Music") - The show will go on whether you like it or not. Composed by JRollerballJRollerball.


GoI Formats

Week of April 8th:

I'm more of a cupcake man myself…


  • SCP-2637 (" A controversial chunk of rock with 196,884-dimensional stakes") - They say that within every atom is another universe. Turns out they weren't too far off. Written by 440 Hertz440 Hertz.
  • SCP-2785 ("Self-Replicating Automaton") - In Soviet Russia, machine builds you. Written by not_a_seagullnot_a_seagull.
  • SCP-3000-EX ("Modified Hospital Beds") - Sometimes the mundane is more terrifying than the anomalous. Written by psulpsul.
  • SCP-2742 ("Caelivorous Remnants") - Reality itself is a feast for the beasts from beyond. Written by NatVoltaicNatVoltaic.
  • SCP-2479 ("Animaland!") - You can ride like a man or get whipped like a dog. Your choice. Written by HaydenheadHaydenhead.


GoI Formats

  • Recruitment Drive (R-28126) - Unfortunately, Elder Foreman Steve Al'uth had not had the chance to take a lunch break yet this month and had to terminate Worker Jesse Lenz' employment to fulfill himself. Written by MayDMayD.

Author Pages

Week of April 15th:

Here comes the Sun, and I say, it's all right…


  • SCP-2693 ("You've Been Down Too Long in the Midnight Sea") - At what point does a human cease to be a human? At what point does a beast cease to be a beast? Written by ghostpageghostpage.
  • SCP-2597 ("Minus-Two Kilograms") - This is to counteract the force of gravity, and prevent the object's escape through the ceiling. Written by GeometryPrimeGeometryPrime.
  • SCP-2853 ("From Dust to Dawn") - Ashes to ashes, life to dust. Written by BillithBillith.
  • SCP-2657 ("Puppet Master") - You hear that? That girl crying out for help? Run for your life. She's hungry. Written by AFX NeuromancerAFX Neuromancer.
  • SCP-2893 ("A Bubble in Time") - You can crush our legs, break our hands, and destroy our weapons, but you will never break our humanity. Written by BananaRepublicBananaRepublic.
  • SCP-2629 ("The Twenty-Nine Year Paintball War") - These ghosts don't want to possess you - they want to play paintball. Written by rockyred9rockyred9.
  • S.D. Locke's Proposal ("When Day Breaks") - Embrace the darkness. Fear the light. Written by ShaggydredlocksShaggydredlocks.
  • SCP-9000.01-J ("SKIP SHIP") - Well my skip could beat up your skip! Written by WrongJohnSilverWrongJohnSilver.


  • Atzak I - Trapped hundreds of feet underwater in a steel coffin, you can't remember anything besides the gigantic eel slowly eating away at your sense of self… Continued in Atzak II, both written by djkaktusdjkaktus.
  • Skirmish at Crane's Pub - Marshall, Carter, and Dark seek to sell a haunted pub - but only over the owner's dead body. Written by MrAnakinSpecterMrAnakinSpecter.

GoI Formats

  • SPC-2000 - We have the technology to rebuild the world in our image - or just create genetic monstrosities to beat up sharks. Yeah, that sounds much cooler. Written by MrWrongMrWrong.


Week of April 22nd

Please report all conspiracies to your local fast food restaurant.


  • SCP-2761 ("Bananazilla") - Yeah, I'm as confused as you. Engineered by OZ OuroborosOZ Ouroboros.
  • SCP-2166 ("Foot Pope") - Everyone played games that only made sense to them when they were kids. This one takes things further. Rules drawn up by ZynZyn.
  • SCP-2767 ("Oppression Blue") - This color is horrible. Makes me feel like the walls are closing in… painted by LordJord96LordJord96.
  • SCP-2653 ("Sausages") - al-Assad was a pig, and by God, he'll be ground up like one. Grilled by LordStonefishLordStonefish.
  • SCP-2594 ("Extradimensional Waiting Room") - Please take a seat. Why not read a magazine? You're going to be here for a while. Written by LilyFlowerLilyFlower and RogetRoget.
  • SCP-2671 ("My buddy, the bird") - I just wanted to help. I failed. Written by ZapperTexZapperTex.
  • SCP-2849 ("Insect Hospital") - Homeopathy has nothing on this. Written by SirensSirens and RogetRoget.
  • SCP-2689 ("The Smooth, Rich Taste of Marlboro") - You'll wish that smoking these things killed. Written by NiblicNiblic.
  • SCP-2823 ("Fen Tigers") - Boy couldn't stick a turn if the reaper had his own pink arse on the wager. Written by AsaelkaAsaelka.
  • SCP-2739 ("Ab Inconvenienti") - This is all one anartist has left of her brother. Constructed by Agent MacLeodAgent MacLeod.
  • SCP-2641 ("Before The Fire") - God is real, and We have imprisoned Him. (Article Deleted) Written by Lt FlopsLt Flops.
  • SCP-2964 ("Xtreme Videozzz") - Taking SWATting to a whole new level. Filmed by MortosMortos.
  • SCP-2659 ("Finback Whale Psychopomp") - The Grim Reaper guides newly deceased humans to the afterlife. Who does the same for whales? Written by minminminmin.
  • SCP-2857 ("Dr. Ji Fan, Ph.D SOCA") - I came here to cook chicken rice and rip holes in the fabric of spacetime - and I'm all out of fabric. Written by MrWrongMrWrong.
  • SCP-2691 ("Covered Bridge") - It's just a bridge… isn't it? Written by n0mgoosen0mgoose.
  • SCP-2649 ("Multidimensional Ceramic Omnivore") - SCP-2649 resembles a white teapot with four pairs of mobile arachnoid legs attached at its base. The mechanism by which these legs are capable of movement is unknown, as the entity appears to be composed entirely of ceramic. Written by GeometryPrimeGeometryPrime.


GoI Formats


Author's Pages

Fandom Stuff

  • A Random DayA Random Day diligently scoured the web for all manner of fan art, but if he missed anything, let him or rumetzenrumetzen know!


Thanks for tuning in again, folks! If you're unsatisfied with the blurb(s) provided for the article(s) you wrote, feel free to change it. Of course, you could just avoid that problem entirely by sending A Random DayA Random Day a blurb for your article. We may or may not use it (if we can think of something more attention-getting, though we can try to stick with one you give us) but we'd really would just like them in order to make the process easier for making these. This is a community thing, and we want authors to give their blurbs to sell these articles much easier. It reduces the workload we have to do, and helps the news come out that much earlier!

Thank you all for continuing to be an excellent community <3

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