Name: Raymond "Annoying-ass numbers" Llama
Clearance: Level 3
Occupation: General research specialist
Profile: Despite being on the Foundation payroll, Dr. Llama has never actually performed a day of work. What appears to be Dr. Llama sitting in his office every day is in fact a crudely built animatronic repeating the phrases “This is looking to be another fruitful, completely legitimate work period,” “Wow! This object is exhibiting anomalous properties which I am currently researching!” and “I sure hope we don’t have another containment breach, ha ha, am I right colleague?”. Dr. Llama’s other work is actually performed a complex array of robots, holograms, and artificial intelligences simulating his semblance.
Dr. Llama’s absence was discovered 6 Feb ████ when a colleague attempted to invite him to a party celebrating his thirty years of non-fatal employment. Since then, contact with the actual Dr. Llama has only been achieved once, undergoing a remote interview in which he confirmed his life was “exactly like Ferris Bueller's Day Off times 365.” It is entirely possible and even likely that Dr. Llama has since deceased, and his equipment continues employment unmoderated.
Reports issued by Dr. Llama Dr. Llama’s automated systems:
SCP-1584 - The one with the life preserver
SCP-1689 - The one with the potatoes
SCP-2187 - The one with the esperantists
SCP-2584 - The one with the snakes
SCP-2282 - The one with the goat