It's All Good
rating: +12+x

This tale touches on the concept of self harm. Proceed with caution.

Lily slumped in her chair, staring at her computer's bright, almost blinding screen. It was 1 AM already, yet there was not a bit of sleep in her eyes.

Her heart felt heavy, threatening to drag her to the floor as she stood to her feet. She'd been like this for hours and hours, and she would probably be like this tomorrow as well. After all, it had been this way for months, why would it change now?

She walked over to her bed and practically fell in, closing her eyes, trying to force herself into unconsciousness. The air was strangely warm for an apartment in the middle of a Wisconsin blizzard. Maybe she'd just gotten used to it. Fidgeting, she brushed her overly short hair away from her eyes — the hair her mother had forced her to cut — and waited.

Thirty seconds went by, but it felt like an hour.

Lily rose from the bed, stumbling over to her door, and before her brain could process it, the kitchen. She blinked, barely thinking as her hand slowly rose, shaking as she reached over to the knife block and gripped a knife in her hand. It slid out easily, with a quiet, satisfying shink. The biggest knife in the block.

Her fingers softly traced the blade. Then, still trembling, she took a breath and touched the knife to her wrist, gasping as the cold metal touched against her warm skin. She'd done this before, she knew exactly what it felt like, but it still always surprised her.

She stayed like that for a minute, just feeling, before quickly sheathing the knife back into its block and staggering back to her room. What the hell was she thinking? She could never—

Lily gulped, pushing away the invasive thought. With heavy breaths, she collapsed onto her chair, closing her laptop screen, and tried to distract herself by looking up to the corkboard on the wall in front of her. Pinned on it were various trinkets and memorabilia, stickers and keychains, various wristbands and ribbons…

Her breathing steadied, each unsteady thought retreating as she studied each item slowly. The plastic axe keychain she'd found in a geocache. A picture of her precious little basset hound. A postcard she'd bought on her vacation to California the previous summer. Then, a cut-out piece of a little plastic wristband. One that she'd worn while she was at the hospital for— of all things— a kidney stone. She giggled softly. What kind of sixteen-year-old gets a kidney stone? She looked at it further, and quickly realized why she had been so hesitant on keeping it before.

Sex: M
Name: Ge—

Her eyes flickered away, and the heaviness on her heart that had previously withdrawing quickly returned. She couldn't deal with that right now. After taking a moment to breathe, she looked back up to the board, her eyes drawn to a keychain hanging from a tack. It was a silver fortune cookie she'd gotten from an old garage sale. A silly little trinket. She reached up, grabbed it, and opened it up to see the two dice inside.

Each side of the dice had a dumb phrase on it. When Lily had first bought them, she'd probably played with them absentmindedly for a minute before placing it back up on the board. After all, dice can only tell you to "get a job" so many times before you get bored with them.

Dumping the dice into her hands, she shook them and rolled. They clattered against her desk.

The phrases "relax" and "sleep" were her results.

Lily stared at the dice, and placed a hand against the side of her head. Then, she laughed. A hearty, sudden laugh that surprised her as much as it delighted her. A repeated reading of the dice would only insight another bout, and so she stood up to compose herself. After the giggles died down, she sighed, and stole one more glance. She grinned, and walked to her bed, suddenly, feeling very, very tired. That feeling she had been waiting all night to feel.

She laid down, closed her eyes, and barely noticed how light her heart felt. Maybe tomorrow she'd fall asleep a little bit easier.

Item Description: An openable silver fortune cookie keychain containing two dice with joke phrases, such as "wash the car" or "rub my back" printed on each side. When rolled by a subject under emotional distress, the dice will invariably return with "relax" and/or "sleep" depending on the time of day.
Date of Recovery: 1/12/2020
Location of Recovery: ████████, Wisconsin, USA
Current Status: In Storage.

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