Interview with 1782-5
rating: +21+x

Archival snippets from object currently redesignated as SCP-2032. 12/08/05

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SCP-1782-5 at time of discovery.

Description: SCP-1782-5 is a Caucasian male, 23 years of age, answering to the name of Robert Newman. Subject is fluent in the English language and somewhat conversant in Russian. SCP-1782-5 has a practical knowledge of neurology and electrical engineering. SCP-1782-5 is behaviorally normal.

SCP-1782-5 is physically normal save for the lack of its head. SCP-1782-5's neck terminates near the epiglottis, but shows no signs of having been severed. Skin near the opening of the neck has been grafted closed by an unknown process. SCP-1782-5 is incapable of speech or sensory perception unless an object resembling an avian head is mounted on its neck.

SCP-1782-5 is only capable of perceiving its head as a normal human head regardless of what is mounted on its neck. SCP-1782-5 has made itself aware of its present condition through trial and error experimentation before it was discovered.

SCP-1782-5 was discovered in an abandoned apartment complex located in Kiev, Ukraine. The room SCP-1782-5 was located in is littered with nearly 400 different issues of Playboy magazine, and one wooden mattress frame.

Excerpt from Interview:

SCP-1782-5: Hello Mr. Ortega

Researcher Ortega: We would like to ask you a few questions regarding yourself and how we found you.

SCP-1782-5: Sure thing guy.

Researcher Ortega: Are you aware that you lack a head?

SCP-1782-5: Yeah. It's not there, I noticed that. I like the one I have now, uh, thanks for that one. The old one was a little itchy.

Researcher Ortega: How did you lose your head?

SCP-1782-5: Well, I forgot to wear a rubber.

Researcher Ortega: Pardon?

SCP-1782-5: A condom, do you call it something different over here?

Researcher Ortega: No, I understand what you're saying. What does that have to do with you losing your head?

SCP-1782-5: Well there was a pregnancy scare, I got sort of worried. I started getting neurotic, and the old lady was worried too. We didn't have any money and we had our whole life ahead of us.

So after a while we're fighting every day over what to do. I asked her, nice as I could, if she considered getting an abortion. Naturally she flipped out on me. I had to move out.

I lived across the hall from her for a few months.

Researcher Ortega: That still doesn't explain your head, or how you're moving around without it.

SCP-1782-5: I don't really know myself, doc. I noticed it was gone one day. I woke up and went to rub my eyes and banged my hands on the headboard. If I hadn't been so confused I would have been scared.

So I pinch myself a lot thinking it's a dream. I can't wake up, but that was okay, I've had this sort of dream where I can't wake up before.

I reach to the left of my bedside on the floor and feel something fuzzy. It feels like one of those fat bird heads my father in law wears when he's working with his chicks.

I reach for it, and put it on my head. I feel this huge jolt as I shoot up out of bed and see myself in the mirror, perfectly fine. I figured it had just been a bad dream.

Researcher Ortega: What happened then?

SCP-1782-5: Well I was freaked out, I ran across the hall to go see my woman.

She wasn't there, the room was completely empty, but Symon was there with his birds, which was weird, because they were kept at the preserve in Madagascar or something.

I say hi and he just smiles at me. I ask him where Ilyena is, and he goes into this rant about Jesus. I yell at him and he just keeps ranting like an idiot. We never liked each other, I go to slap him in the face.

Then Fedir, Ilyena's friend, walks in the room in in his work suit and camera. I ask him what the hell he's doing here. I had suspected him of things for a long time, but, I'm just kind of paranoid. I start to think he's in cahoots with Symon. Fedir says he's here to see Ilyena. This makes me mad of course. We shout at each other for a while and then he throws his camera at me.

I dodge the camera and it hits Symon in the skull, I accidentally step on one of the birds, then the room starts to stink like copper. Symon is lying down against the wall now and blood is coming from his head. I panic, finally, and push past Fedir out of the room.

I wanted to call the police at this point. I go to knock on the next-door neighbor's door but no one is there. I check all the doors down the hall. I get frustrated because no one is opening up, so I open a door. No one is there.

I open another door, no people. No one is in the apartment. I run back to 198 d, where Symon was. I swing the door open and the room is completely empty.

I start laughing at that point. I was dreaming for sure. Still I turned around and made my way toward my room to go lie down, I felt this was the proper thing to do.

Nothing much else happens from there. I went to work, did my grocery shopping. In a few weeks your friends showed up and took me with them. I'm okay now except for the missing head thing.

Researcher Ortega: You went out in public?

SCP-1782-5: Yeah. Like I said doctor I'm prone to these sorts of random paranoid thoughts. I thought I was imagining the whole thing. When people looked at me I always reassured myself that I was just very ugly.

Researcher Ortega: No incidents?

SCP-1782-5: Some punks pulled my head off once.

Researcher Ortega: What happened then?

SCP-1782-5: How would I know? I got my head back somehow I know that.

Researcher Ortega: Thank you. We have one final question regarding the magazines in your room.

SCP-1782-5: Go ahead.

Researcher Ortega: Did they manifest after the incident?

SCP-1782-5: No. They have been manifesting since I was about 16.

Researcher Ortega: Thank you.

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