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If it's any consolation, I'm pretty sure I laughfarted a couple times writing the thing.

by DJ SupticDJ Suptic, 19 Jul 2018 22:55

In the future, try getting some feedback from either the sandbox or your peers before posting it.

The idea isn't bad, per se, but it's not all that well executed. There are joke SCPs in a similar vein to this one that are very successful, but they are more fleshed out and attempt things from a more clever angle. Take notes from the SCP-J that turns out to be the sun, or the one that is more or less a frenzied panic over the concept of weird looking insects, for example.

You could write the article from the perspective of a researcher who has always hated dentists and is going on an absurd rant, or a lolFoundation type article where everyone in the Foundation has forgotten what a dentists' office is, and are only discovering it upon a scheduled checkup, etc. As long as it's rewritten with more comedic depth than "dentists are bad/scary, here's a google image search of a dentists' office", and looks at it from a humorous or clever angle, it should work.

by Doctor YuDoctor Yu, 19 Jul 2018 22:52

I thought this was 4000con… not 3000con…

by Captain KirbyCaptain Kirby, 19 Jul 2018 22:52

Alright, so you may or may not recognize me from various (video game) modding communities, so it's fitting my first forum comment is on something that is more-or-less "video game glitch: the SCP - exploration log."

First off, love the idea, love the logs. I think the main SCP itself could be tweaked a bit to incorporate more of the "this is junk data" theme in it without giving the whole game away, and would benefit greatly from it. As it was I felt like I was reading an SCP on Diagon Alley or Danny the Street until I got to the logs. Ambiguity isn't a bad thing in that regard though, more of a personal preference.

Second, I'm going to echo what a lot of other commenters have said about the use of "[REDACTED]", in that I think most of the uses add nothing to the narrative as it is. Most are too ambiguous to really do much other than serve as narrative speed bumps that slow the reader down. A little modification could make them a bit more thematically appropriate without reducing the effective blanking of information. For example (not to pick on this section), you could say something like:

Food was found to be fresh and edible, though unusually high in compounds known to cause [REDACTED], consistent with the effects of SCP-████.

That implies a reason for the redaction without actually explaining anything, and makes it a lot less jarring.

Third, I think ambiguity in general is the largest thing that undermines this log. Aside from the previously identified section about the plants with "heavy levels of mutation" that gives no specifics as to what kind of mutation, what stands out to me the most are the accounts of the recovered computer hardware. The log indicates that the hardware itself is to blame for the errors, but fails to elaborate on what or why. I could see that as being more relevant for an addendum or Recovered Materials log, but it should at least be mentioned in the Survey Log that further examination is taking place; I CANNOT imagine the Foundation not putting that hardware under the microscope (literally) to figure out what exactly is wrong with it. As for what they find, terms like "non-Euclidean geometries" spring to mind.

Fourth, that previous thought leads me to a recommendation: expand this please. More Survey Logs, maybe a Recovered Materials Log, and just a little more detail into the "junk data" nature of this little slice of weird reality. Just a little more filling in would improve this and its parent skip a lot. Hell, this seems like the perfect sort of place for some section of the Foundation to try and establish some kind of storage facility, testing area, emergency bunker, or who knows what else. The loss of a handful of agents rules out more "safe" uses, but the Foundation has set up research facilities in far less hospitable conditions with far more additional loss. They certainly don't abandon potential storage areas with built-in limited access before they are utterly sure they can't counteract the negative effects of said areas.

In other words, throw more Agents and D-class into the grinder and write about the results!

Something that I originally thought up as an entry on the Anomalous Items list, but realized it actually had enough meat on its bones for a proper SCP.

Find it in my sandbox

The static is a pretty good idea! I'll mull it over, a bit — I'm now increasingly loathe to change the article considering it's well the year-mark in age (and I feel increasingly strange about changing articles the older they are), but the static idea does at least let me wipe over some of the parts of the article that retrospectively make me grimace.

by The Great HippoThe Great Hippo, 19 Jul 2018 22:33

What's up with the constantly changing avatars?

No signature defined.

@DrCaroll by mlistermlister, 19 Jul 2018 22:32

I feel really mean for telling you this- sorry- but the 10th anniversary was actually last year :p we had lots of posts and art for it back then.

So basically, I created an SCP with another author a while ago and would like to build off of the mini-universe I could say the two of us created. This one is simply being bounced off the idea wall.

A creature spawned from my original SCP, 3243, that has shown considerable amounts of intelligence, as well as considerable locomotion and a complex emotional capacity, including a verifiable allegiance to its creator.

The creature as well would be able to complete the same tasks as The Warden, including the creation of the same items. I'm trying to craft a bit of a story in an expansion of SCPs from an living in the Everglades area of my original SCP

Thanks for the feedback

like previously, i would like to address some things.

by higanshigans, 19 Jul 2018 22:20

I still can't really see how this would be received very well. It doesn't have to do with the 4k theme of history and the entire article is just going to be redaction (practically).

Again, what are some details that you actually plan on throwing in there? Are they all going to be random and have no correlation with one another?

Here's some ideas I got.

I presume this can be any blog, and there's really no reason it needs to be on tumblr, right? If there's a significance to why it needs to be tumblr specifically, I don't know what. The main hing is, by specifying tumblr, I think it kinda invites expectation that there could be a link to actual 2721 tumblr blogs where some updates might be made every few months or a few times a year. Maybe knowing there are no 2721 tumblrs I can actually go find had a slight effect on my immersion.

What about the choice of homestuck specifically? If there is indeed a reason for choosing homestuck for LYRE's favorite comic, I guess I don't see it. It could indeed be because humans and aliens try to avoid the apocalypse. Maybe it's startlingly similar to what 2721 was going to do to Earth. (Slight offtopic, Homestuck never went deep into the grief of losing your entire planet, family, friends, and species. These kids lost everything in a day, but they all seem to go on like they were shut off from the world. Might make it less relavent to 2721, but whatever.)

So the specific use of tumblr and homestuck without meaning may seem, especially to people who never touched tumblr or homestuck, like the author inserted their self-interests and hobbies into LYRE. And they probably did, and that doesn't necessarily make it bad. But there needs to be a reason to add these aspects, and both the blog site and comic can be interchangeable with a few others. (Not all, but a few.)

TLDR: What smells like a self-insert is when I write an oddly specific set of likes and dislikes that never really come uo again or matter on the whole.

Not done yet. One more thing. This skip was like 90% written from the perspective of the skip itself. The thing is it doesn't have a closing imo. It abruptly ends with LORD's blog. What small change will greatly improve this skip is that we don't forget, in the end, we are writing and reading this article from the foundation's cold and logical perspective, no matter how crazy the subject. That's how wackier things than 2721 felt in with the world imo. Just a small addendum at the end, or some more comments on the blogs in form of footnotes would help bring readers' immersion back to the foundation itself.

This is just talking from. a "narrative flow" aspect though. I wouldn't know what sort of content would best fit in suck parts.

by DeRockProjectDeRockProject, 19 Jul 2018 21:48

Feces from the intestines had been used to trace symbols of unknown meaning on the walls of the basement.



by LtLittleMoonLtLittleMoon, 19 Jul 2018 21:47

I loved your idea! It's simple, yet wonderful!

First my suggestions and tips for the main text

And now, because I don't want to invade your work, a loose summary about the nature of most of my suggestions:

Your work is awesome! I want so bad to give you my upvote, good job!

Re: Rhyme Time by AbovinableAbovinable, 19 Jul 2018 21:40

Specific details will surround around an object so interesting that its details cannot be described. The whole premises is:

X is a(n) Y object that is so interesting that Z.

EDIT: Z is any detail I deem necessary, and I'm going to limit myself to up to 20 details scattered in the article.

Not a pro at much unless causing people to feel mental/physical pain counts for anything

You guys can be the judge of that

Re: Non-profession Helpers by Jack KentJack Kent, 19 Jul 2018 21:38

Sorry, but as soon as I pegged that this was evil Santa, you'd lost me. I started guffawing like an idiot, and the rising body count didn't deter me. From that point, it just seemed like a barrage of arbitrarily horrible things being done to children in order to convince me by brute force that evil Santa was a scary concept. It just seemed like it trying too hard to compensate for the inherent silliness of the concept. I might dig this if there was any sense of fun or black comedy to it, but it's just relentlessly grim and joyless in its nastiness, and 'serial killer Slender Klaus' is too silly for me to take that tone seriously. When I was enjoying the article, I felt like it was in spite of what was intended. When I wasn't enjoying it, it was just a bunch of nasty shit done to kids, repeated ad infinitum.

by RioghailRioghail, 19 Jul 2018 21:24
DrBleepDrBleep 19 Jul 2018 21:10
in discussion Per Page Discussions / Per page discussions » SCP-3456

This feedback is much more helpful, and contains points that I can use to better the piece. I appreciate the apology and will do my best to implement the necessary changes as soon as I'm physically able.

by DrBleepDrBleep, 19 Jul 2018 21:10

Happy 10th Anniversary SCP Foundation, 10 years creating dreams, nightmares, wonders and horrors, 10 years bringing closer the horror, the fiction and the science fiction to thousand of readers around the world.

The people that started this project should be proud how far it’s gone.

As final words the people that form part of this community must always remember that the project is more that ideologies, opinions and personal belief and the ideal should be always make the SCPverse better and better.

First of all, use the sandbox (and read the forum rules, if haven't yet).

Good luck.

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