GoHW > Chapter_5.js / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page GoHW > Chapter_5.js.

> boot Author Commentary

Ihp 27 Jun 2014 04:06

Right, this is what a Maxwellist Holy Writ looks like. And before you ask, as far as I can tell, this is all valid Javascript, but for some reason, I was never able to get it to compile properly in any compiler I could find. If somebody can tell me the reason why, this would be greatly appreciated.

This is kind of cheating, as this covers two 'objects', or rather, two anomalies: the Pineal Gland from Implanting God and the Signal that was received alongside it. Hedwig (yes, I am serious about that name) never needed one because she was so close to her God, WAN.

Anyway. I hope you enjoy reading this more than I enjoyed writing it. spending about three-odd hours sticking code in compilers only to have it return error message after error message until I just said "f*ck it" was not exactly fun.

Re: > boot Author Commentary

BlueRiging 27 Jun 2014 06:21

I applaud the effort of actually trying to have it be legitimate code. If I was writing such an article, I probably would have just done my best to make it look like Java, and given up about 2 hours before you did. Props.

_{Seriously though, Hedwig? Alright I deal… I deal…}

Re: > boot Author Commentary

Crayne 27 Jun 2014 11:24

I was never able to get it to compile properly in any compiler I could find. If somebody can tell me the reason why, this would be greatly appreciated.

You had an extra quote mark in 14. And stupid shit like that is always the cause of errors. ;)

Re: > boot Author Commentary

_termiom 10 May 2017 01:34

Only at the end I realized they were talking about the internet and not some divine symbol! Very good writing too!

Meserach 27 Jun 2014 12:20

Oh awesome, you found a way to make this work. Well done.

Roget 28 Jun 2014 05:10

I dunno. I like these, I like the ideas behind them, but this doesn't feel like it brings anything new to the continuity you're building. The tale where the dude gets an internet implant basically gave all the same information in a much more entertaining(and easier to read) way.

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Whether you like it or not, history is on our side. We will bury you!

Anaxagoras 28 Jun 2014 16:06

So, the CotBG aren't actually interested in having a secure password protection on their documents? Or making them resistant to the most basic buffer overflow attacks?

This take on the format too isn't doing it for me. Sure, it's JavaScript, but it's not interesting JavaScript, just a bunch of print statements.

Lambda Fairy 03 Jul 2014 01:04

To play devil's advocate: perhaps the code thing isn't to keep the text secure, but as a purely symbolic gesture, a way of becoming "closer" to their god. It seems like something a techno-cult would do.

Also, I'm not sure what you mean by "buffer overflow" — did you mean a brute-force attack?

Doktori 29 Jun 2014 10:06

The poor pineal gland, not getting any respect. I guess these people are never going to sleep again. Also, those surgeons must be really good – the pineal is deep inside the brain and hard to operate on.

Scorpion451 01 Jul 2014 14:53

From the description in Implanting God, it seems they've found a good way to deal with that issue…

"Well then. I should be in good hands."
"Not exactly hands." The nurse smiled sheepishly as she opened the doors to the operating room.

@Ihpkmn I'm working on an SCP recovered from a CotBG "monastery", so I decided I'd better brush up on them, and found your tales. Thrilled about these major expansions you've been adding to the CotBG lore, making them into a three dimensional group with more to them than fanatical technophilia.

Julian Ashenveil 11 Jul 2014 03:06

It does look like valid Javascript. Mind you, when I took Java programming I think we were using Java 5 and 6 (or something like that), this was back in fall '08 and Spring '09 though.

Lambda Fairy 11 Jul 2014 04:38

JavaScript is not Java!!!

With that out of the way, yeah, the code is valid JS and would work if you tried to run it.

Tags

plaidypus 23 Sep 2018 17:22

I think it would be helpful if there were tags for the denominations of CotBG. I think it would be helpful to people (like me) who are new to the GoI.

(account deleted) 03 Mar 2020 01:07

idk if it's only my compiler but the 'else' on line 62 is bugging mine out

Lt Flops 02 Aug 2020 22:29

Is this hilarious to anyone else? I went into this article neutral, expecting to read a serious entry about my favourite CotBG sect, but I interpreted solid deadpan humour from the entire ordeal surrounding the implant. That's by no means a bad thing! I just found another angle to enjoy here that might not have been intended.

Love it!

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http://www.scpwiki.com/floppyphoenix