Thank you everyone who offered feedback on this in the chat.
JC
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This is the discussion related to the wiki page SCP-1360.
Wasn't there something like this in Doctor Who on this episode where Martha Jones and a hospital ended up on the moon? I remember the old lady vampire thing having two bodyguards made out of clothe.
They were made of solid leather.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Smith_and_Jones_(Doctor_Who)
Remember this from IRC - I like it! I think you did the right thing by not making it a MC&D tie-in. The idea of a weaponised Pinocchio is pretty great and works well with the mysterious 'Anderson'.
I have this odd feeling that there's some connection with SCP-1599.
Huh, not one that was intentional at least. Wouldn't it be interesting if the two encountered each other at one point.
For some reason I can't stop hearing Agent Smith saying "Mr. Aaaanderson".
It's fairly well written and has only one or two tiny mistakes, but it's not interesting enough (to me) for an upvote, feels like there ought to be something more.
On the other hand, it's not bad at all, so a no-vote from me.
Feel free to suggest improvements to the article you might think of. I'm all ears.
I'm not sure what to say - I guess the article's just not for me, if you know what I mean.
Ah, I get it. Not your cup of tea.
You said you saw some mistakes, can you point those out, I'd like to fix them if I can.
1) "notified prior to the collection of any SCP-1360-02 from SCP-1360-01." - would read better if it were "…collection of any samples of SCP-1360-02"
2) "of plastic casings universally covered in 1 cm" - universally not really necessary here
3) "sewn into the fabric of the subject’s left arm in red SCP-1360-02 thread." - more clinical if it's written as ".. left arm in a red variant of SCP-1360-02
4) "Substantial damage to SCP-1360-01’s body can be repaired when SCP-1360-02 fibers are sewn shut with SCP-1360-02 thread or covered with patches made of SCP-1360-02. These repairs eventually fuse together until they become indistinguishable from the remainder of the SCP-1360-01’s coating. All samples of the material disintegrate after 48 hours of separation from SCP-1360-01."
I thought this could do with some rephrasing, it was somewhat confusing the first time I read it.
"Substantial damage to SCP-1360-01’s body are able to be completely repaired when SCP-1360-02 fibers fuse over damaged areas. The process can be greatly accelerated by covering the damaged area with patches of SCP-1360-02, it is hypothesized that damaged areas repair in a similar manner to SCP-1360-02. All samples of SCP-1360-02 disintegrate after 48 hours of separation from SCP-1360-01."
5) "release and prominent return to" prominent is the wrong word to use here, you must think it means something else. "Successive" would be what I assume you were intending.
I can't see anything else for now, but I'll let you know if I spot anything. : )
Thank you for pointing those out. I'll be sure to make the changes. :)
I'm thinking you mean "subsequent" rather than "successive"? Also, to the author, "highly obsessed" is kind of redundant.
I can't figure out if I like this. It's well written, but doesn't really grab me in any way. This time, I'll err on the side of an upvote.
/forum/t-555224/scp-1360#post-
page revision: 3, last edited: 22 Sep 2018 03:57
