Attempt 2 at this concept, with the steaming pile of cliche (hopefully) expunged.
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Cliche has been successfully expunged. This is now interesting enough for my upvote. Brofist.
if your reading this your gay
Yup, I like this a lot better than the first version. Less cliche, more interesting and clever, and you got rid of that bit about standard personnel being allowed to play for funsies without any real supervision. Well done.
First order is, of course, to try dropping SCP-500 in there.
I doubt the Foundation would risk losing anymore of those things without being sure about getting a definite return.
I thought much the same thing at first, but considering the value of the stuff it seems a hell of a risk. Besides, unless the staff really, really wanted more of it (which frankly would spoil the one major ohshi- factor of 500) the only fair outcomes would be A) all 2-5 samples lost, or B) very small return, like use 3 pills and end up with 5.
In any case I leave that decision to staff and/or the original author of 500 (if still present).
Looks great and interesting, though maybe with some more documentations on tests the foundation has done with regards to disassembling the device? Other than that upboat.
This could be fun to encourage foolish experiment logs, somewhere between 914 and the coffee machine. I think some sort of randomization factor in the payoff would add more interest.
It's certainly an idea, but it doesn't much fit the theme I was going for here, and more importantly it treads dangerously close to "Things what make other things" territory. This obviously isn't a great SCP, and I never expect it to be; but as the final version of my first submission, I'm content with it.
The "sexual intercourse" line really did it to me. I spent an amusing 30 seconds imaginig someone scared of having their dick dissapear inside. +1 just for that wittiness.
I really liked it except for it's third stage effects, it would have been great if the subjects would start mutilating themselves to keep playing instead of developing "A fear of holes where you put things", but well, I guess it's still ok.
That seems a little… Much, seeing as it's got a fairly light starting point. If prolonged exposure (past the current "Stage 3") was endured, then perhaps, but "I can gamble!" to "I don't want fingers!" (assumed form of disabling mutilation) seems melodramatic.
Oddly enough, the first version of this that I submitted had a "rip your flesh off to keep playing" effect instead of the current stage 3 effect. Frankly, it sucked, and the downvotes & deletion of the original version corroborate that opinion.
Going the obvious route with an object's effects is dull as hell, especially if that route is something involving spontaneous insanity and/or body horror self-mutilation. We have hundreds of body horror and crazy-to-death articles on the site- both have been done ad nauseum, and written better than I could hope to at that. So while I'll gladly admit that this is only a mediocre SCP, it does something unique and (I hope) a little interesting. If our voting system means anything, it's objectively better this way.
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page revision: 1, last edited: 25 Feb 2021 03:57
