First one after nearly a year of hanging out in IRC. I'm considering having the subjects hear the voices of the previous victims, and/or having subjects who are exposed again after *two* weeks reading something that depresses them so much they have to share it with everybody they know.
Date: 20 Apr 2010 19:38
Number of posts: 22
RSS: New posts
Much as I love seeing someone use this image, I don't think this article goes in the right direction. You've taken a message designed to inspire guilt, and used it to take it away; for me, that just seems to clash.
I was considering going down the 'makes you feel guilty', but I think we already have enough things what make you feel bad for things you've done.
One thing that could be done would be to have photographs taken by affected subjects also display the anomalous writing; the photograph would then be taken by, I don't know, a serial killer or something. Or just scrap the picture entirely. Or rewrite it as a thing what make you feel bad; I don't think we have one that doesn't actually just make you relieve the experience or something similar.
I have to say that the after-effect seems perfectly natural to me. Either way the subject goes mad from guilt, this just takes the idea from a less obvious angle. Having some mysterious writing assuage your feelings constantly is likely to make you start questioning actions that you previously thought benign.
I like that, sorts. The idea of the subject slowly sinking into a sort of cycle of socratic self justification is much better than them simply no longer feeling guilty. Especially if underneath it all they do still feel guilty and slowly start to crack.
I'm not entirely sure what you mean by 'socratic self justification', but I'm interpreting it as them coming up with justifications and muttering them to themselves in their internal dialog, or possibly out loud if they get crazy enough.
All right, I reworked the effect, and changed it to a neon sign. I picked that since I like the ambiguity of the phrase "Too late to die young"; either it means that your best years are behind you, and so you should just give up, or that you've outgrown those stupid teenage dreams and now you can follow your real dreams, or something similar. I had to crop the girl out, since I couldn't explain what the hell she was doing there.
A couple issues:
1. This should be Safe, not Euclid, since it can (apparently) be locked up and left alone.
2. The description of the script is a bit awkward. It describes what it isn't, but then you have to skip to the end to find out what it might be. Maybe reword it like that it doesn't match the subject's handwriting or surrounding text, but is instead a unique script (see addendum).
3. That is a hell of a lot of semicolons, and this coming from a fan of semicolons.
Otherwise very good, and upvote-worthy.
Wouldn't it be Euclid, based on "mechanisms that are foreign to humans?"
The majority of SCPs' mechanisms are foreign in some way. The question is whether or not they're unpredictably dangerous. Quik's Locked Box Test covers it well, I think:
If you can lock the thing away somewhere, leave it alone, and nothing will happen, the thing is Safe.
If you lock something away somewhere and leave it alone, but there's no telling what will happen, it's Euclid.
If you lock something away, leave it alone, and all hell breaks loose, it's Keter.
I changed the classification to Safe since you can just leave it unplugged, and I rewrote it to remove the semicolons, but I'm not sure what you mean by 2. I figure that if it states that it's not the subject's own handwriting or the writing of surrounding text, it has to be some other style by elimination, right?
So not only will it pull at your morals and sanity (somewhat) it'll also eat your….handwriting, I guess, if you die? I like it.
This part is really bugging me:
These sentences are not written in the subject's own style or in that of the surrounding text, but are instead(see Addendum 078-01)
I think it could use a minor rewording to something like "These sentences are not written in the subject's own style or in that of the surrounding text, but are instead in an usual mix of print and cursive (see Addendum 078-01)". Forcing the person to jump to the end is just awkward.
Other than that, I like it.
It's interesting but I would like to see some more test results.
Such as what happens if the exposed person is kept from any written word. Or if the subject sincerely doesn't give a crap or have any nagging guilt does it still affect them?
Would be interesting to see how subjects react to receiving counseling and reach acceptance of their actions before the 'beneficial' stage completes.