[…]two-meter tall[…]
Is this needed? Is this important for the narrative?
[…]patrolled by security elements,[…]
'Security elements' do you mean 'security personnel'?
[…]two miles outside the outskirts of SCP-XXXX.
I suggest just 'three kilometers outside of SCP-XXXX'.
[…]two security personnel at all time.
'times'
SCP-XXXX is a midwestern American town known as Portsden located in the state of Ohio.
I suggest: 'SCP-XXXX is Portsden, Ohio.' Note: I feel you can also 'SCP-XXXX is Portsden, Ohio in the American Midwest.' But I might be biased. The first iteration is really all you need to be honest.
[…]closely resemble baseline homo sapiens.
'Homo sapiens' (be sure to italicise it too)
SCP-XXXX is subjected to what will henceforth be referred to as a 'cycle'.
I suggest 'SCP-XXXX is subjected to cyclical anomalous events.'
[…]usually revolving around SCP-XXXX-1 through 5.
You haven't told the reader yet what SCP-XXXX-1 to -5 are.
[…]SCP-XXXX-2 being late for a PTA meeting.
That bitch Helen has once again sabotaged Karen.
SCP-XXXX-A instances or SCP-XXXX-1 through 5 will be repaired instantly. Any and all supplies, including food, fuel and luxuries, will instantly reappear at the beginning of each cycle.
Why don't you designate SCP-XXX-1 to -5 AS SCP-XXXX-As so you only have to put SCP-XXXX-A?
You also haven't told the reader what SCP-XXXX-A is yet!!
The inhabitants of SCP-XXXX2 can be divided into two categories; secondary and primary entities.
You need to tell the reader this information sooner, and also not as a footnote.
[…]their close resemblance towards Homo Sapiens,[…]
'Homo sapiens'
Most of the personalities of SCP-XXXX-A instances are described as 'cardboard' and 'two-dimensional' by Foundation psychologists.
The clinical tone is lacking. I suggest you describe the specifics of the -A's personalities using psychological jargon. For example: 'Most of the personalities of SCP-XXXX-A instances lack empathy, sympathy, and social skills.'
[…]there are several 'higher functioning' instances that are shown to be more advanced[…]
Higher functioning how? This sentence is lacking in clinical tone. What specifically do the -1-5's DO and ACT that is notable by Foundation researchers?
The primary entities consist of the towns remaining population, specifically the five members of the 'Hayes' family. The Hayes family members are Alfred and Ruby Hayes,4 the mother and father, along with their three children Ellie,5 Ray6 and Sara.7 These instances will henceforth be referred to as SCP-XXXX-1 through 5. Unlike SCP-XXXX-A instances, SCP-XXXX-1 through 5 are shown to require the same nutritional standards as baseline humans. As for 2021, no SCP-XXXX-A instances have been observed to age, neither has SCP-XXXX-1 through 5.
This entire paragraph is structured oddly and is confusing. I suggest paring down the information as much as possible. The footnotes are also distracting. (On a funny note: Is this Schitt's Creek?)
And my daughter has been one for…I don't know how long. She's hot-wired cars, driven cars, fired guns and even stabbed a guy. I…I don't know what's happened but she's…it's like she's growing up and learning skills but…she's still a baby.
This is really cool actually.
**SCP-XXXX-1: I remember finding[…]
Formatting! You missed the second **
Then I woke up in bed like nothing ever happened.
This is rather emotional, and I get that. But I feel like you haven't pushed this enough. It reads like -1 is living in a really fucked up "Groundhog's Day" and as the reader I really need to feel that.
Agent Joseph Clarke: You said it yourself. This place repaired your entire family being killed…I mean…what could we even do?
SCP-XXXX-1: Make them change channel.
This is a very odd and off final interaction. I don't feel the Foundation would be willing to neutralise the anomaly. I get the vibe you are going for with -1's final statement. But I feel that this can be elaborated on and pushed further. I like where it's going.
