First greenlight idea seeking

Summary:

this is my first time creating an idea greenlight search

First greenlight idea seeking fixed version 1.3

Tukapee 12 Feb 2021 19:07

Seeking Greenlights: Yes

Page Type: SCP Article

Elevator Pitch: The basic of this idea is for my scp article is of an ancient stone like craved platform creation with 3 destroyed ark ways and one still in contacted ark with ancient Latin glyphs spelling The Gateway on the remaining ark way.

Central Narrative: ok its my first time so go easy on me. This Stone ark construction was found deep underground within a massive cave system just off the coast of Ireland, Founded by two cave explores, one of them being a foundation staff scientist contacted the foundation of their discovery. At the center of it all, there are mysterious runes on 3 separate dial all constructed of stone like material.

Hook/Attention-Grabber: whats unique about my idea? I suppose that its a historically construction gateway made by humans from ages ago and acts as a reality portal Staton to any known alternative reality/universe.

Additional Notes: sorry this is bad! Its my first greenlight, and the changed version so I hope its acceptable this round

Last edited on 14 Feb 2021 18:48 by Tukapee Show more

Re: First greenlight idea seeking

Dr Itzhak 12 Feb 2021 19:20

CANNOT GREENLIGHT YET
Hello Tukapee! It's nice to see new people making idea's I hope that my crit will help you!
So let's take a look!

+ Open for crit

the basic idea of it is like a gateway to other realities

If it is the basic idea write it in the "Elevator Pitch" section.

My idea is of a historical stone constructed platform with arc ways on 4 sides of it

I feel that you left this a little vague, how does the foundation find out about it? How do they know it's historical? My tip to improve this is to explain: How the foundation found out about it.

it has a stone code way at the center of it, with mysterious runes and that each rune pattern can open a passage to other worlds just as that

I feel like this belongs to the Central Narrative section.

Since there is nothing else to work with this is the end of my crit, I also suggest fixing some grammar errors like miss-spellings and no captioning. That's all!

After you fix your idea a bit I suggest you contact proffessional critiques here:
http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/butterfly-squad-roster

Good luck! :)

Last edited on 12 Feb 2021 19:21 by Dr Itzhak Show more

Re: First greenlight idea seeking

Tukapee 13 Feb 2021 18:01

Thank you for your suggestions, followed what you said and I hope its good this time, and SPaG will be fixed in drafting process cause I'm bad at it

Re: First greenlight idea seeking

Dr Itzhak 13 Feb 2021 19:00

CANNOT GREENLIGHT YET
Hello again Tukapee! I came back to make sure your idea is in tip-top shape!
So let's take a look again!

+ Open

Located at the center of the platform, it has a stone code way at the center of it,

You repeated the same explanation twice, if you meant something else then I suggest just fixing grammar so it would be more understood.

Other then that nothing else is wrong about the idea. BUT you do need to fix some spelling and phrasing here and there but if you do that I am sure you will succeed!

Hope I helped again!

Last edited on 13 Feb 2021 19:01 by Dr Itzhak Show more

Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Zyn 14 Feb 2021 07:13

Dr Itzhak, to better help the author here, can you explain your feedback?

I suggest just fixing grammar so it would be more understood.

you do need to fix some spelling and phrasing here and there

Generally grammar and spelling aren't the primary focus for concept posts, unless there are severe enough issues so as to deter reviewers. Can you provide some examples of the kinds of spelling and phrasing errors the author needs to fix here? Are they easy to identify or would the author potentially benefit more from using a writing assistance tool like Grammarly?

Also, overall, did you like or dislike anything about the premise? Why?

For more information on giving feedback in this forum, you can look at this thread: http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/forum/t-9804362/so-you-want-to-be-a-concept-reviewer

Re: Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Tukapee 14 Feb 2021 18:45

SPaG will be fixed later on in draft form and thank you for the advice

Re: Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Zyn 14 Feb 2021 19:22

SPaG will be fixed later on in draft form

Reviewers aren't likely to believe this if your concept post has an excess of simple errors. A reviewer giving a greenlight basically tells everyone, "this is my vote of confidence that the author can make this concept into a draft I would enjoy reading".

If an author doesn't demonstrate basic writing skills in the conceptual stage, reviewers are less confident that said author will be able to make a draft free of simple errors. Also, if a reviewer sees a concept thread that looks very sloppy, they may decline to review the thread until the errors are fixed—if the author doesn't bother to make sure that their material is free of basic errors, why should a reviewer bother to review that material?

Re: First greenlight idea seeking

Tukapee 14 Feb 2021 18:45

ah I though u wanted it relocated, guess not. I'll fix that up and have it removed for the fixed up