SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

Summary:

Seeking greenlights for my first SC.

SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

oREAGano 05 Jun 2020 18:00

Seeking greenlights for my first SC. I don't really have a name for it but for now, it will be known as the Psychological Sludge.

I moved and trimmed your thread summary, since it was taking up extra space in the main forum screen. Try to keep thread descriptions (the text in the little box under the thread title) and titles short so you don't crowd out other authors in the forum listing. ~Zyn

Seeking Greenlights: Yes

Page Type: SCP Article

Page Layout: Fairly straightforward. I plan on having several Addendums explaining observations by scientists and doctors on the SCP. These will all be summarized in the description and special containment procedures.

Elevator Pitch: SCP-XXXX is a thick sludge that is brown-red in color, transparent, and contains some solid chunks. These solid chunks will be later identified as human and other animal remains, primarily brain matter. SCP-XXXX has a mind of its own and feeds off the minds of others by infesting its victim and causing them to slowly mentally degrade until they are under complete control of SCP-XXXX. SCP-XXXX constantly seeks out a better, physically stronger, individual to reside in. Killing the host of SCP-XXXX will not kill SCP-XXXX but will instead force it to release from the host and find a new one. SCP-XXXX requires special containment procedures and are as follows: SCP-XXXX is to be contained in an air-tight container made of ████████. The container must be sterilized before containment and lined with a layer of wax. Any wax that is toxic when ingested should never be used.

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Central Narrative: SCP-XXXX was first found residing in an individual known as Subject XXXX-01. This individual, upon further examination, was found lacking a brain. Eventually, it was discovered that SCP-XXXX had consumed the brain of Subject XXXX-01 and had since been acting as the “brain” of the subject, controlling the mind and body of the subject. Eventually, it is discovered that anything consumed/absorbed by SCP-XXXX remains in SCP-XXXX and does not degrade or disintegrate. Because of this, anything contained within SCP-XXXX is negatively put onto the host (ie. If there was an infection in an individual’s brain that SCP-XXXX absorbed, the next host will likely have to fight that infection as well). This is thought to be why SCP-XXXX constantly seeks a stronger individual in hopes that the individual will be able to fight off any infection or disease SCP-XXXX carries and eventually become its “new Subject XXXX-01.”

Hook/Attention-Grabber: SCP-XXXX is a highly contagious parasitic organism. While SCP-XXXX does not display characteristics of other parasites, the research of Dr. █████ has proven that SCP-XXXX displays properties characteristic of that found in a Toxoplasma gondii Invasion. The isolation of small amounts of SCP-XXXX has proven effective for research purposes.

Additional Notes: Most of this came to mind when I couldn't sleep the other night (which is pretty typical). I also had an idea about luring SCP-XXXX in with a baby pig but the idea felt forced as I was drafting it into reality.

As a courtesy to our readers on mobile devices, please collapse long posts. Also, I've moved this to the Ideas Critique forum, as there is no draft here. ~Zyn

Last edited on 06 Jun 2020 04:39 by Zyn Show more

Re: SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

cybersqyd 06 Jun 2020 18:17

Iunno, this doesn't seem particularly interesting to me as a whole. It's just kinda, a virus that seeks out the strongest person and then,,,you don't really have much of a narrative around it? There's not really a big story here beyond you just stating that it does what it does?

If you want to make this work, you're going to have to really figure out a way to convey the kinda, visceral discomfort this could provoke in some kinda narrative way: by having someone affected and exploring what it does to them.

Even then, I think this needs a more nuanced exploration of what's happening than just 'it searches for the strongest': perhaps by exploring it's failure to find a suitable host and going down a body horror route; or perhaps by exploring how the Foundation reacts to it?

Re: SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

oREAGano 06 Jun 2020 21:24

Thank you for your feedback!

I got a similar response when I had sent this to my friends to get their feedback. The addendums are what I plan on having really drive the idea. I planned on giving more information in the idea submission to begin with but I was limited by word count. So far, I've had the idea of SCP-XXXX spreading to a scientist on staff. That scientist is then observed to lead to a discovery that SCP-XXXX slowly consumes the brain of its victims until they are no longer themselves, but rather the SCP trying to communicate.

As far as exploring how the Foundation reacts to it, maybe further tests and discovery could be done on Subject XXXX-01? Especially as I've been workshopping the idea, Subject XXXX-01 is just there in the beginning and is simply just a way for the SCP to get in the facility, maybe I could add more to that part of the narrative?

Re: SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

oREAGano 08 Jun 2020 22:12

I have revised my page layout to be a little more detailed. I guess this could also be considered the central narrative so I'm not going to specifically label it as either:

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Addendum XXXX.1: Discovery
-Interview with Subject XXXX-01
Subject XXXX-01 is the first known victim to SCP-XXXX. Subject XXXX-01 is detained in what is essentially a vegetable state. He is unable to speak for himself and all words stated by Subject XXXX-01 are essentially assumed to be SCP-XXXX trying to communicate with scientists, telling them to "cease" their research. The SCP spreads from Subject XXXX-01 to the interviewer and then to another scientist on staff (Subject XXXX-03).
Addendum XXXX.2: Exploration of Subject XXXX-03
-Journal Entry by Subject XXXX-03
Subject XXXX-03 begins confused. He dosn't quite remember being a victim to SCP-XXXX nor what brought him to be detained. He still has a loose recollection of who he is but his memory is quickly failing as he has no clue why he has been detained.
-Report from a Scientist on staff
Subject XXXX-03 became violent and unruly after his first journal entry. He had to be detained but once scientists and guards got to him, he was already injured, with several abrasions on his right temple (see note 1). Subject XXXX-03's blood was drawn and sent to the lab for testing. Once scientists got to Subject XXXX-03, he has already begun violently scratching at his right temple, resulting in major lacerations. Subject XXXX-03 had also begun hitting this part of his head against the corner of a table which is later removed from the room.
-Subject XXXX-03 Blood work Findings
The results of Subject XXXX-03's blood work show that he has Hemophilia and Anemia, in addition to other blood conditions that aren't much cause for concern. The antibodies in Subject XXXX-03's blood led to the discovery of the toxoplasma gondii parasite (see note 2) in Subject XXXX-03's system. Subject XXXX-03 is highly allergic to cats, meaning it is unlikely that he contracted this parasite from a litter box.
-Caution Notice
Caution signs are posted at and around Subject XXXX-03's containment as it is now thought that he contains a potential biohazard.
-Journal Entry by Subject XXXX-03
Subject XXXX-03 at this point has lost a complete sense of who he is. He doesn't know why tests are being done and he doesn't even know what the "large orange suits" are, let alone why people are wearing them.
-Interview with Subject XXXX-03
Dr. Paterson, a psychologist, interviews Subject XXXX-03 to try and figure out what has happened to him and how he is feeling. Subject XXXX-03, still having the ability to think for himself (kind of), strikes a conversation with Dr. Paterson over his name and insists that he call him Mark. Dr. Paterson asks "Mark" about the day outlined in Addendum XXXX.1. Mark says he doesn't recall this day happening and immediately gets very worried that it was his fault because he "seems to be getting in a lot of trouble." Any documents mentioning Subject XXXX-03 or Mark cease after the events outlined in Addendum XXXX.2.
Addendum XXXX.3: Exploration of Subject XXXX-01
-Autopsy Report of Subject XXXX-01
The cause of death of Subject XXXX-01 is reported to be mass organ failure. Essentially, what I want to get across in this is that all of a sudden, his "brain" (which was SCP-XXXX for a while) just stopped and so did all of his organs. This is because SCP-XXXX leaves Subject XXXX-01's body and moves on to Subject XXXX-02 (the interviewer from Addendum XXXX.1) and everything just ceases function after that. A similar scenario is found in Subject XXXX-02 who was found on the floor in the hallway with his brain partially removed.
-Lab Results
Blood of Subject XXXX-01 as well as some of an "unknown viscous brown-red substance" (SCP-XXXX) is recovered from Subject XXXX-01's body and tested. The unknown substance is found to essentially be cerebrospinal fluid mixed with many different blood types, likely from other victims. Subject XXXX-01 was found to be a hemophiliac after testing his blood.
-Statement on Subject XXXX-02
Connects findings from Subject XXXX-01's autopsy and blood work with Subject XXXX-02.
Addendum XXXX.4: Beginning Containment
-Release of SCP-XXXX from Subject XXXX-03
Subject XXXX-03, after getting to a similar state of that seen in Subject XXXX-01, is executed and SCP-XXXX is released and contained in a glass mason jar. This jar was left in the containment cell used for Subject XXXX-01 and Subject XXXX-03 because it was already contaminated with the substance.
-Containment Test 2
SCP-XXXX is able to escape the Mason jar and manages to squeeze out of a small crack underneath the door of its containment cell. SCP-XXXX is then recontained, this time in an air-tight cylindrical container made of ██████.
-D-XXXX-01
For testing purposes, Subject D-XXXX-01 is put into the containment cell of SCP-XXXX and SCP-XXXX is released. D-XXXX-01 is infected with SCP-XXXX and passes out almost immediately. Interviews were attempted with D-XXXX-01 but it seems as if SCP-XXXX absorbed D-XXXX-01's brain quickly and all that is said by D-XXXX-01 is "cease" over and over. D-XXXX-01 is locked in the containment cell of SCP-XXXX and the cylindrical container is left in the middle of the room on a table, opened. A few days later, scientists enter SCP-XXXX's containment to do their daily testing and D-XXXX-01 is found dead on the floor with SCP-XXXX in a corner. To lure SCP-XXXX into the cylindrical container, the scientists put a whole pig brain in the container. SCP-XXXX enters the container to absorb the brain and the lid is closed.
-Tests on D-XXXX-01
An autopsy report of D-XXXX-01 is done and findings are similar to that found in Subject XXXX-01's autopsy. The main difference is that dust particles and various mild bacteria are found in both D-XXXX-01's system and in the residue left behind by SCP-XXXX. All future containment attempts are then done by fully sterilizing SCP-XXXX's containment cylinder before placing the pig brain in the container.
Addendum XXXX.5: Final Containment
-Report on Final Containment
After several failed attempts to isolate a small portion of SCP-XXXX without the entire entity escaping from its containment cylinder, it is discovered that wax seems to be a weakness. Beeswax is most commonly used to line the cylindrical container to prevent SCP-XXXX from escaping too quickly. This also makes it much easier to isolate a small amount of SCP-XXXX for testing. While other waxes were not tested, waxes that are toxic to the human body are to never be used out of fear of SCP-XXXX using it to weaken its victims before full consumption of their brain.

Notes (these will either be included as footnotes or will simply be more clear in the actual writing):
1. The abrasions on the right temple are because SCP-XXXX starts attacking in the right frontal lobe of the brain. The frontal lobes are what control a person's problem solving, judgment, and movement. Taking down the frontal lobes first is a key part in SCP-XXXX's ability to completely overtake its victims.
2. The toxoplasma gondii parasite is most often contracted after poor hand washing following cleaning a litterbox. There are other ways to contract the parasite, but this is the most common and "usual" way.

Re: SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

caspian2 10 Jun 2020 13:09

Summoned via PM.

Hello oREAGano. Let’s take a look at your concept together.

Who’s that pokemon?

So my first impressions are that there are quite a few logical issues with the concept. It feels like you’re trying to do too much just to add complexity to the scip itself.

SCP-XXXX has a mind of its own and feeds off the minds of others by infesting its victim and causing them to slowly mentally degrade until they are under complete control of SCP-XXXX.

How exactly does sludge “infest” a person? Is it through the blood stream? But later on, you mention it fills the brain cavity?

Why “slowly mentally degrade”? So the victim can initially fight back? What does the person look/behave like when he’s infected by the sludge?

Eventually, it is discovered that anything consumed/absorbed by SCP-XXXX remains in SCP-XXXX and does not degrade or disintegrate.

This doesn’t make sense… physically. If the sludge has been consuming multiple victims over a long period of time, how does everything fit into a single person’s body?

the individual will be able to fight off any infection or disease SCP-XXXX carries and eventually become its “new Subject XXXX-01.”

This, as a primary motivation for the scip, seems a little underwhelming. So basically the sludge is just trying to stay healthy and fight off a cold? Does it have an origin story that made it behave this way?

Right now, the concept is all over the place. I would suggest you simplifying the scip’s anomalous properties and try to give it a plausible explanation for its existence.

If you decide to revise your concept, do drop me another PM and I’ll take a look when I’m free. Cheers and all the best!

Re: SCP Article: The Psychological Sludge

oREAGano 12 Jun 2020 07:13

June 11th Revision

Seeking Greenlights: Yes

Page Type: SCP Article

Page Layout: Several addendums will be added at the end of the article that outlines the discovery of the SCP. These will also be what the "meat" of the central narrative is contained in.

Elevator Pitch: SCP-XXXX is a thick sludge that is brown-red in color and transparent. SCP-XXXX is able to think for itself but can not survive outside of a host. SCP-XXXX becomes hostile when exposed to any amount of bacteria due to lacking an immune system. SCP-XXXX infests its victims by entering the body through entrance points in the head (eyes, nose, mouth, ears). The SCP then starts at the right frontal lobe and works at destroying the brain so that it can live in the person's skull and control their body and act as their brain.

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Central Narrative: The SCP is first discovered when a man in his mid-30s is detained. This man (Subject XXXX-01) is found with severe lacerations on his right temple and all he can mutter out is the word "Cease." Several personnel interact with the SCP through its victims and discover its anomalous biohazardous effects. A psychologist on staff goes to interview Subject XXXX-03 (former scientist on staff, victim of SCP). By this point, Subject XXXX-03 doesn't remember who he is. He still has the ability to think because the SCP hasn't destroyed his brain in its entirety. Autopsies are done on both Subject XXXX-01 and Subject XXXX-02 (the scientist who interviewed Subject XXXX-01). These autopsies report that the cause of death for both victims was total organ failure. The "sludge" was also tested to see what it is and it is discovered that the substance is essentially cerebrospinal fluid mixed with several different blood types. One thing that is found to be consistent for all victims is they all seem to be hemophiliacs. The scientists who were victims of the SCP don't have any record stating that they have hemophilia, so it is assumed that the SCP carried it from person to person. After several attempts, it is discovered that the SCP can be contained in an air-tight container if the container is first sterilized. The SCP will not try to escape and will remain dormant in the container as its life isn't threatened.

Hook/Attention-Grabber: SCP-XXXX looks for someone who can fight off all infections and diseases it carries in hopes of finding someone it can reside in for as long as possible.

Notes: Previous revision puts the central narrative in more depth

Changes Made: Clarified how SCP "infests" victims, removed the fact that the SCP contains brain matter and other bodily substances other than small amounts of blood (yeah, didn't make a whole lot of sense)

Last edited on 12 Jun 2020 17:06 by oREAGano Show more

Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Zyn 12 Jun 2020 07:19

ETA: addressed, thank you.

Last edited on 13 Jun 2020 06:15 by Zyn Show more

Re: Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

oREAGano 12 Jun 2020 17:06

Done! So sorry about that!