I must tend to the Chigs

Summary:

Half pig, half featherless chicken, everyone wants a Chig.

I must tend to the Chigs

Dr Langley 29 May 2020 19:08

Seeking Greenlights: No

Page Type: SCP Article

Genre: Comedy

Elevator Pitch: With the head and front legs of a pig, and the back and hind-legs of a chicken, the Chig™ is brought to you by Mutacorp in collaboration with dado. Sounds like a pig walks like a chicken, the Chig™ will be sure to bring your family joy. Mutacorp claims no responsibility for the conversion of family and friends into a Chig™. The Chig produces a foul-smelling liquid that causes people to obsess over them.

Central Narrative: Town overrun with Chigs is raided by the foundation. People are interviewed and display a great desire to "tend to the Chigs", which is usually a room in the person's house that they dump bodies in to be converted into Chigs. A PoI that works with Mutacorp is detained and interviewed. They continually ask if the foundation would like to "tend to the Chigs" and go as far as revealing Mutacorp's location in exchange for a Chig. The foundation arrives at the given location to find an abandoned industrial complex with a single individual within. They run at the team screaming, "I'm Chigging out man" before combusting and releasing a blastwave that converts all the personnel into Chigs.

Hook/Attention-Grabber: This is the image the reader is shown: http://scp-sandbox-3.wdfiles.com/local--files/dr-langly2/Chig.jpg

Additional Notes: I'm waiting for more crit on my draft (for another SCP that's been greenlit) so I'm just throwing this out there to see if it's worth pursuing later on. Additionally, I feel my narrative may be a little lacklustre, so some direction on what I could do with it would be very noice.

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Dr Langley

Last edited on 04 Jun 2020 02:14 by Dr Langley Show more

Forum Criticism Team - Captain Post

Zyn 31 May 2020 04:09

Since this thread has fallen to page 6 with no responses, this is a quick staff reminder to the author that if you haven't yet, you should contact reviewers directly to request feedback as needed.

Please refer to this thread for more information: http://www.scp-wiki.net/forum/t-13282692/how-to-get-more-reviews

If you have already reached out to multiple reviewers and received no reply, notify a staff member for assistance finding a reviewer.

Re: I must tend to the Chigs

Naveil 01 Jun 2020 17:41

Responding to PM Request - will crit soon-ish

There isn't a whole lot of material to crit here, but from what I can tell, you're going for absurdist comedy? I feel like something like this'll only work if you stick with it the whole way through.

The narrative itself could be entertaining, but try not to get too absurd. It's sorta difficult for me to crit, considering you're not providing a whole lot of information, and you're relying on pre-existing terms to get your message across, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Last edited on 05 Jun 2020 15:46 by Naveil Show more

Re: I must tend to the Chigs

Dr Sage Evergreen 01 Jun 2020 17:47

(Will crit soon)
This is a very interesting concept.
I honestly really like the narrative, and I can totally see it as something you could pursue writing in the near future! Granted, you do use compulsion as a motivation, something that serves as a turn-off for many readers and critiquers. However, I think it may be just as interesting to see people tending to the Chigs since the Chigs are technically their family. Perhaps Chig bodies release some type of hallucinogen that creates the illusion of a person helping out their family by "tending" to the chigs?I feel like there are ways more interesting to get people to tend to the chigs without using outright mind control.

IT may also be cool to see some experimentation logs with the Chigs. Are they sentient? Do they have any memories from their past lives? Can they speak or communicate in any way? It'll be interesting to explore these questions in an addendum! however, that being said, don't make the story too long and stick to essential details. Keep it to around 3 Addendums max, otherwise you may loose your readers. Aside from that, I think you have a solid storyline! I'd give you a greenlight if you were looking for one, but I think this would make an excellent SCP. Can't wait to see it up! Please PM me if you have any more questions or things you want me too look over!

Last edited on 09 Jun 2020 07:09 by Dr Sage Evergreen Show more