SCP Idea - All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback

Summary:

This is an SCP concept. Needs reviews and greenlights. Hope you enjoy

SCP Idea - All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback

LongTimeNoC 18 Mar 2020 16:46

Okay, so I haven't been on the SCP Wiki in quite some time now, and that's given me time to come up with an interesting idea. "All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback" came to my mind while scrolling through Series 6 articles. This SCP, (SCP-XXXX) will have been first recovered in Alaska. It's basically a metre-tall hunchback which is incredibly dangerous. It excretes liquid nitrogen, and a seperate, unknown substance which exists as a -175°C gas surrounding the creature.

SCP-XXXX will be classed as either Euclid or Keter, as it is often hostile towards Foundation staff and attempts to breach containment. It will run slightly faster than the average human.

There will likely be a narrative feature, such as an initial recovery log, or an interview, etc.
Please consider greenlighting this article, and I hope you like it :)

Re: SCP Idea - All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback

Dr Remember 18 Mar 2020 17:55

I suggest using the template in the new forum guidelines so your concept can be easily understood by us reviewers. Since you "haven't been on the SCP wiki for some time now" checking up on the updated rules will help you out so you don't make any more mistakes.

+crit

As for your concept, it's vague. My understanding is that it's a three-foot (1 meter) tall creature that releases liquid nitrogen and something else for apparently some reason, and it can run super fast and it's dangerous. This is extremely bare-bones in terms of description of what the skip is, what it does, its origins, and containment procedures. With the narrative, there's just a sentence saying there's going to be a narrative. I'd like to know what that is.

To help you brainstorm, here are some basic questions that might feel patronizing but are significant in helping you solidify your ideas:

• What precisely is the skip?
• What does the skip do, and for what purpose?
• How did the skip come into existence, and how was it discovered?
• What are the main plot points of the narrative?
• Who are the main characters and what do they learn at the end of the story?
• How will you organize the narrative (formatting, order of plot points, styling)?

MidnightMorpher has good points as well and concepts you can play with. I hope this helps. If you have a sandbox, feel free to link it below.

Last edited on 18 Mar 2020 17:58 by Dr Remember Show more

Re: SCP Idea - All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback

MidnightMorpher 18 Mar 2020 17:50

Hello, hello! While I can’t give greenlights, I can definitely give feedback, so I hope you don’t mind :)

+ Crit Time

One, I feel like the concept is a tad barebones. It’s just a highly dangerous humanoid with several features tacked onto it (excreting liquid nitrogen and unknown gas), especially since you don’t explain your narrative here. Yes, I know that you plan to have the narrative in the discovery logs or interviews, but if you want other more experienced reviewers to be able to give feedback and potentially give greenlights, I suggest expanding on your narrative here, as that would help a lot.

Onto the actual concept, I have some questions concerning the humanoid. Is it capable of communicating with the Foundation like a ragilar human being (being able to use a language to communicate, etc), or is it just a mindless beast hellbent on destroying everything in its path? Why is it trying to attempt containment breaches? Is there some place that it wants to be at? What is the origin of this humanoid? I believe if you answer these questions, then expand if possible, you could potentially have more experienced reviewers provide feedback on your work.

Anyways, other than me suggesting you go to IRC or the Butterfly Squad Roster and PM someone for feedback, you also read some of the guides provided, like SCP Common Pitfalls, and several essays on weaving narrative into your article (sorry for the lack of links, i can’t seem to find them now for some reason). I wish you luck with your writing~

Re: SCP Idea - All Hail the Alaskan Hunchback

Simartar 18 Mar 2020 18:30

Placeholder, will crit within 24 hours.

Junior Staff Post

MalyceGraves 18 Mar 2020 18:37

Author,

Per the new required reading forum guidelines, please fill out the new concept template to seek feedback on your idea:

◙ Show Template ◙

**Seeking Greenlights:** Put yes or no.

**Page Type:** SCP Article, Tale, GoI Format, Joke SCP, Site Dossier, Other (specify)

**Genre (Optional):** Horror, Drama/Emotional, Comedy, Action, History, Other (specify)

**Page Layout (Optional):** [How will you will structure the page in terms of information presentation, or plot development? If you plan on using a unique format/format screw, describe that here.]

**Elevator Pitch:** [What is the basic core idea? Use a bullet point list if necessary.] 

**Central Narrative:** [Describe the story beats or overarching context/"big picture" for your piece. If there is no story content, put "none".] 

**Hook/Attention-Grabber:** [What is novel/unique about your premise? What is special about your idea here that will make it stand out among the other works already on the mainsite?] 

**Additional Notes:** [Note any concerns or particular areas of assistance you would like reviewers to focus on.]

Rather than posting a new comment, edit your previous post using the "edit" function under the "options" tab to the lower right of your first comment.

Remember that the combined text for your answers to the the last four sections (Elevator Pitch, Central Narrative, Hook/Attention-Grabber, and Additional Notes) MAY NOT exceed 400 words. For convenience, authors can use this page to check wordcount: https://wordcounter.net/

Once you have revised your post accordingly, please reach out to reviewers to request that they look at your thread. You can find example lists of contacts in the Required Reading thread linked above.