Whenever it encounters someone, it will proceed to influence the mind of the victim to walk with it into the water
Compulsion effects are generally not well-received anymore, because it often reads like "I couldn't think of a reason someone would do this so they're just compelled to do it."
to go to an island referred to as "Atila Island". "Atila Island" appears to be located somewhere in the Bering Sea, but satellite and submarine scans of the area show no trace.
So….does the person just drown or freeze? Can you escape once he's influenced you? How does The Foundation get this information?
If SCP-XXXX does not encounter a victim, it will cause a snowstorm, with strength of the storm becoming stronger after each failed encounter.
Would this not just make it less likely that people would go outside and thus make it harder for him to find a victim??? Does the strength of the storms have an upper limit
What you have currently is the "Superpowered humanoid" or "X-Man" concept. An SCP article is much more than simply an anomalous item, being, place, or event. The true meat of the SCP is the story around the anomalous thing. The thing itself is a vehicle that the narrative is attached to. To give my best example from Series 1, look at SCP 093: The anomalous item itself is a rock that turns mirrors into interdimensional portals. The thing that makes this SCP shine is the story; the history of the dimension that it leads to.
We need to know more than just "it's a being that influences you to go to an island that doesn't exist and makes snowstorms if he doesn't get victims." What story are you going to tell - How The Foundation found it, Who or what created it and why, did someone use it to some end? What are its goals? Why is it bringing people to this nonexistent island? Why the storms? (These are not all questions that must be answered, these are some possible narrative hooks.)
I also recommend reading a significant amount of the top-rated SCPs from the last several months, and focus on reading more recent SCPs rather than older series. Many early series SCPs would not last a day under current SCP standards, and a few are only still around because of their history with the wiki itself. (This does not apply to all early series SCPs, but many of these were written before the wiki's style had really been cemented.)
The anomalous entity, while important, is not actually the main focus of the SCP. A good story, a compelling narrative, something that makes the reader feel something - that is the goal of an SCP article. What feeling do you want to evoke from the reader? Horror? Empathy? Sadness? You need to create a narrative around this object and its effects.
I am not saying this to discourage you, I just want you to understand the amount of effort that goes into creating a successful SCP.
If you can revise this idea with a story that you want to tell, we will be able to give you much more meaningful and constructive critique.
The anomalous being is the vehicle, the narrative is the person driving, the readers are the passengers. You can have the shiniest, most polished, most interesting vehicle in the world, but without the driver, the passengers aren't going anywhere. Where is the narrative taking the readers, and how is it getting them there?
