First SCP

Summary:

This is my first SCP I am writing and wanted feedback on how to develop it.

First SCP

JurassicPlayz 31 Dec 2019 01:58

My SCP would be a human like biological machine that is given the task of recording everything that happens in the SCP universe to the biggest of SCPS to the smallest of ants. It only records this world with others recording other worlds thus the name The Historian. Please give feed back and tell me if it has already been done.

Re: First SCP

F15H35 31 Dec 2019 02:22

[Placeholder. Will crit soon]

So there's really not much to work with here so I'm gonna try my best to give a review on this.

I'm not really sure about this. SCP-073 "Cain" technically can backup data just by using his mind. 073 can recall years worth of data and assists the Foundation in backing up files.

You have here is your own definition of an all knowing history entity but a bit more machine (also the same as 073). Along with that, you haven't provided any narrative in your idea which kind of makes it incomplete. Like, what story are you gonna implement with idea? What will get the readers hooked on this?

Here are the key principles to help you out on this:

• Existence: How did the entity exist? Created? Summoned?
• Intention: What does your entity exactly want to do? Record everything for fun? Hatch a plan for world domination?
• Discovery: How was the entity discovered? Public reports? CCTV? Sightings?
• Containment: How will the Foundation contain it? (This may be optional)
• Foundations Intention: What will the Foundation do with the entity? Tests? Interviews?

• Narrative: What is the story being implemented here? What will get the readers hooked on the article?

Last edited on 31 Dec 2019 12:24 by F15H35 Show more

Re: First SCP

JurassicPlayz 31 Dec 2019 16:36

Thanks for the feed back I started the file already before posting this and it may answer a few of the tings you've stated please give it a read and tell ne what you think⬇⬇⬇
http://scp-sandbox-3.wikidot.com/jurassicplayz

Re: First SCP

Doctor Fullham 31 Dec 2019 17:28

You should be able to answer the above questions without simply posting a link to your sandbox. This forum is for critiquing the idea during pre-draft phase, but if you've already written it down, you should be able to give simple, concise answers to what is being asked here.

Re: First SCP

DrStaton 31 Dec 2019 19:20

You say that it would only record things in this world with others recording other worlds. What exactly do you mean by that?

Re: First SCP

GregoryGrim 31 Dec 2019 20:27

So basically from what I've gathered this SCP would be one instance in a possibly universe/multiverse spanning network of historians that are deployed by an unknown entity to chronicle all life in the universe/multiverse. Do I have that right?

The main issue I'd see with this are that there are a bunch of SCPs whose purpose/shtick is historiography in some capacity or something very similar to this. You'd need a way to make this one distinct from all of those. The best way to to do that as you've apparently also realized is probably to play up the "network" and "unknown entity" angles.

Having looked over your sandbox which you linked to previously I think it's a good idea if you read some more articles to get a feel for the formal, objective style and structure the entries are supposed to adhere to as well as the tone that would be appropriate for a document detailing the capture and questioning of an alien lifeform.

So while the core idea is good, the overall writing still needs work. I recommend looking over the How to Write an SCP pages again, not just for advice, but also for inspiration. Don't worry, there's no shame in taking your time. The best articles weren't written in a day either (most of them at least).