Thanks to Silber for the title and to everyone who offered their feedback.
Out of Your Element / Discussion
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This is the discussion related to the wiki page Out of Your Element.
Only two qualms with this: a minor typo I don't even consider worth looking up again to point out, and the weapon the agent carries into the office at the end. To quote EchoFourDelta in this thread,
Submachine guns haven't been offensively or defensively relevant since the invention of the intermediate rifle cartridge and its propagation, which began well over half a century ago. They fell into even greater irrelevance with the invention of practical personal armor. The only reason they're still in the popular consciousness is simply because a lot of real-world organizations are slow to adapt.
I'd say change it to a pistol, but even then, it's nitpicking that doesn't really affect my vote.
Or a carbine, or a PDW…
Though really, I don't think a MP5 or something is totally outside of the realm of the possible here.
A nice bit of constructive criticism. I think I'll make an appropriate edit. Thanks!
We seriously need to use the "Foundation Universe" forum for stuff like this more often.
An easy to access section of the Guides could describe standard issue equipment, tactics, and personnel duties.
The trip gets weirder when you listen Deloused in the Comatorium and feel the effects of sleep deprivation whle reading this. Lovely as Hell if you ask me.
Also, this is the very first time I've seen someone giving an actual personality to 682 (taking aside the "disgusting" spamming).
She's repeating the words because she's conflicted about hearing them out or just ripping them both to chunks.
…
Alright, this was actually rather good and I didn't expect it to go that way. It reminded me of a Kingsman meets Nobody thing, and it was pleasing. Good pacing, excellent language. Even better detail added to the base product. The characterization was near-perfect and engaging.
I want to read more of the Gentlemen.
This tickled my fancy.
The Adjustment bureau, mixed up with some Kingsmen, while taking place in the Foundation universe?
Sign me up!
Extra-dimensional +1
moar pls
Excellent. Much improved from the draft I read. Looking forward to more.
/forum/t-1251800/out-of-your-element#post-
page revision: 7, last edited: 17 Nov 2020 06:16
