Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

Summary:

Empty yet animated suit of armour that appears to have some semblance of consciousness

Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

Selphia 13 Aug 2019 21:35

(This is my first SCP so please, don't be afraid to be harsh)

This SCP resembles a suit of medieval armour that is capable of teleportation and seeks to always escape confinement. It is capable of trapping humans inside of it without harming them for use as hostages to negotiate release. Although it is harmless, it doesn't like being contained.

While it has some semblance of consciousness, it does not appear to be very intelligent, being easily fooled and recaptured, should it escape

I thought it would be a good play on the cliché of a haunted suit of armour but viewed from a more scientific/analytical angle. It is intended to play on more primal fears of ghosts and the undead but without the associated violence and physical threat.

If you want to see the full draft, let me know

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

LovecraftianCrusader 13 Aug 2019 22:19

Well, well, well, who do we have here? A fellow Middle-ages enthusiast?

Ok, let's cut the crap and all that - i have an similar SCP. We could make them related - though the difference is, mine is very dangerous and intelligent. Are you interested in cooperation? It will make both SCPs more interesting.

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

Researcher Morrison 13 Aug 2019 22:34

I can suddenly see the two suits having witty banter/ arguing whilst trying to escape, while the dull one tends to botch containment breach attempts. Love the idea of the two being related!

Edit: I suppose I should leave some feedback.

I think this anomaly has enough personality and play on emotion to do well, but the teleportation aspect seems a bit much - I get the same vibes as SCP's that just move super fast and are unpredictable. To play on the idea of a a fear of ghosts like you mentioned, what if instead of teleporting, the armor was able to phase or pass through certain materials? Or maybe it uses negotiation as it's primary mean of bypassing blockades in it's search for freedom?

If you do keep the teleportation idea, I think it would be wise to place some restrictions on it. When can it teleport? How far? How often? Do certain criteria have to be met? Just a thought so that we don't end up with a monster manual entry.

Last edited on 13 Aug 2019 23:28 by Researcher Morrison Show more

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

LovecraftianCrusader 13 Aug 2019 22:37

Oh, mine would be upon these stopping the dull one from escaping - He works with the Foundation. But i also saw an opportunity for some arguments between a intelligent and cooperative armor set and a dull, not containable one. Maybe older-younger brother relationship? It is very promising, and i hope that we start working together.

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

Zyn 13 Aug 2019 23:24

I can suddenly see the two suits having witty banter/ arguing whilst trying to escape, while the dull one tends to botch containment breach attempts.

This may be better material for a tale, since the audience isn't going to automatically know about the other entity while reading the SCP entry for one of the two.

That said… it might be a bit premature to be thinking of crosslinking, given that animated suits of armor are pretty common across fiction genres (especially anime and video game series) and I'm not entirely certain that what you have here will necessarily be guaranteed successful on the site. Do you have any backstory for the entity? What you have currently is just behavior and some personality data.

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

Selphia 14 Aug 2019 16:31

I appreciate your feedback. I agree that the teleportation aspect is a working idea (not sure if I'm going to keep it, it was a spur of the moment idea to be honest)

Thanks again, as I mentioned, this is my first work so I'm still learning

Forum Criticism Team - Junior Staff Post

TheMightyMcB 13 Aug 2019 22:44

LovecraftianCrusader, this comment contains no feedback whatsoever. As stated in the Critique Forum Guidelines:

Staff prioritize threads with no replies. If someone leaves a relatively generic comment, that lowers a thread's visibility and makes it less likely that a staff member will leave a review. If you're not inclined to write a thorough review (i.e., covering concept, execution, a few examples of specific fixes, and so on), please hold off on making the first post so a more experienced reviewer can address the thread first.

In the future, unless you are prepared to give a conscientious critique of an idea, please refrain from making the first comment.

Also, another user's thread is not the place to advertise your own SCP ideas. If you would like to collaborate, then either PM the author in question or include quality criticisms in your request.

Re: Animated Suit of Medieval Armour

TheMightyMcB 13 Aug 2019 22:45

Placeholder.

Alright, so my main criticism of this idea is that you don't necessarily do anything interesting with this suit of armor. It's anomalous and it does its thing, but there's no story in there, no plot, nothing to shock the reader, etc.

I suggest giving this essay on simple item SCPs a read to see what I'm talking about.

Last edited on 14 Aug 2019 22:58 by TheMightyMcB Show more