Calibri Bold's Mega Cool Author Page

Introduction

Hello everyone, and welcome to my mega cool author page! I am Calibri Bold, SCP Wiki author and Junior Staff member. This page is where I keep information regarding my articles, work, and other things I find important.

I'm a huge nerd for anything SCP, Minecraft, Terraria, or Star Wars related. Along with writing for the site I also dabble a bit in CSS and graphic design. I particularly enjoy character-driven pieces more than anything else, and I'm also a fan of action and adventure stories. I don't have any pets unfortunately, but I do have an old frog stuffie named Floppy!

My Resumé

Junior Staff for MAST and Community Outreach.
Inventor of and primary contributor to the Decommissioning Department.
Wrote the longest JamCon 2020 entry: SCP-5559: Restaurant Rivalry, at 3,434 words.
Achieved 2nd place in the Exquisite Corpse Contest 2020: SCP-5545: 𝙰 𝙱 𝙽 𝙾 𝚁 𝙼 𝙰 𝙻 𝙸 𝚃 𝚈 (my Special Containment Procedures, Yossipossi's Description), with a score of +127.
Achieved 4th place in the Canon Renaissance Contest: Mary Shelley's Foundation, alongside Grigori Karpin, Nagiros, and redredred, with a total score of +249.
Primary author of the unofficial Latin branch of the wiki.

SCP-4456-D: No One Expects The Spanish Decommission!

"May we pray that God has not taken wrath upon us, and that we continue to prosper under His grace."

SCP-4456-D was my third article posted to the site, and I consider it to be one of my claims to fame here. It was inspired by multiple discussions about the Decommissioned object class and how it was used back in the day. What piqued my interest was that while the Decommissioned class was primarily an out-of-universe tool, the tales about it, as well as how affected objects would be documented (SCP-XXX-D), implied that it had a definition in-universe, separate from the Neutralized object class.

I began asking around, doing research, seeing if I could get a definitive answer. However, its status as an outdated staff tool meant that an in-universe definition was never clearly defined, leaving it sort of open in a way. The best interpretation I could come up with was that it was an object that was deliberately neutralized by the Foundation or a member of senior staff, rather than one that was destroyed accidentally.

As I thought about it, I wondered how people would respond to another SCP that was, to some degree, Decommissioned. The practice was considered outdated, of course, but it would be neat to apply it to a modern SCP article¹ and see if I could make it work. I already had an idea for an SCP article about an asexually reproducing warship², and decided incorporate the Decommissioned class into it.

My first hurdle was coming up with an object that would necessitate destruction, since the Foundation rarely destroys SCP objects, without being something dangerous and uncontainable to the point of being ridiculous. I thought it would be fun to explore reasons that the Foundation would destroy an object, beyond it just being something difficult to contain. I decided to throw in a couple of unorthodox wrenches here, so to speak. Obviously, it would have to be something difficult to contain and whatnot, but I also made it both expensive to keep contained, and include a situation where containing it might actually be illegal to some extent. I thought of some other reasons a generic object might be Decommissioned, and threw them all together into a neat little checklist-type form you can see on the article.

My second hurdle was a combination of both in- and out-of-universe justification. The Decommissioned class hadn't been used in an extremely long time, and I would need to be able to fit it in an article naturally, beyond just some lolFoundation thing. And thus the Decommissioning Department was born: a department³ dedicated to determining which objects necessitated destruction, as well as finding a way to do so effectively. I put my author avatar, Dr. C. Bold, as head of the department, mostly so I could really cement credit for this particular piece of the site.

After a lot of drafting and revising, I posted the article, along with a short tale about the Decommissioning Department. Sadly, the tale didn't survive, but the main SCP article did, and it thrived! It was my second article to reach +100, and the entire thing is something I'm quite proud I was able to pull off. Someday though, I'm gonna get back to that tale. Just you wait. Awesome, I rewrote it.

+ SCP-3448-J

+ Jam Contest 2020 Entries

+ SCP-LA-II

- SCP-LA-II

SCP-LA-II: Fruit

"Ad vestras cubiculas ite, nunc!"

So, for a bit of backstory, I took a few years of Latin in high school. Can I actually speak Latin or even really know any Latin? Sadly, no. In the interest of fairness, it wasn't our teacher's fault, he's a cool guy and a cool teacher. It's hard to retain information about the language, especially when you're not expressly trying to become fluent in it, mainly because Latin is just not something that's applicable at all in day-to-day life.

Or at least, so I thought.

I was sitting in the IRC chatroom, chilling as I usually do, when stormbreath brought up the subject of a Latin translation branch for the wiki. It was certainly something interesting, so I asked about it, and he introduced me to the unofficial Latin branch of the wiki. It was pretty much defunct, a thing a few users had put together way back in the day, but it was definitely cool, and I thought maybe I could dig up what little Latin knowledge I could retain and put something together.

I hadn't forgotten everything about Latin. I knew just enough so that I could (very slowly) translate words, find out how to conjugate/decline them, etc. I repurposed an old draft, one which was very short but which I knew wouldn't take off on the mainsite. After a few hours, I'd translated the whole thing to Latin. I sent the draft over to my former Latin teacher (himself a casual SCP fan), who helped me fix up the grammar and whatnot, and then I posted.

Like I said, the Latin branch is mostly defunct; it's unofficial, and most of the people who were on there had departed, gone inactive, or simply lost interest.. I showed it to stormbreath and some other SCP folks, we had a good laugh over the whole thing, but it obviously wasn't anything serious.

Until it was.

See, I'd joked about posting the translation to the mainsite, but obviously, that was just a joke. However, I learned that I could post an English translation to the International Translation Archive, and I wanted to see how that would go. As it turned out, it went significantly better than expected. Reception was mixed, of course; I myself was fully aware that it was a generally poor article. However, some folks did find it funny, and many people were quite fascinated by the idea of a Latin article and all, so it saw moderate success.

Since then, it's been translated into a few other languages, with wildly varying degrees of success. The Japanese branch absolutely loved it, shooting it to +20. The Russian branch loathed the article, dropping it past -20 with only two upvotes, and absolutely roasting it in the comments. I have no idea why it's still up on that branch, but I assume it's because the Russian branch has different deletion policies.

Anyway, that's the story of my Latin branch article, and marked the beginning of some other cool things. It's the very first original Latin branch SCP; originally, the branch had been home to just translations of existing articles. Since then, myself and stormbreath have both written 001 proposals for the Latin wiki, and proceeded to translate them into English for the INT branch. As for my plans for Latin articles, I don't have any at the moment, but rest assured I'm certainly not finished there.

+ Exquisite Corpse 2020 Entries

- Exquisite Corpse 2020 Entries

Exquisite Corpse Contest 2020

"And you won’t know what you’re getting until you get it."

Well, this was a trip.

Let's start with the big one: SCP-5545: 𝙰 𝙱 𝙽 𝙾 𝚁 𝙼 𝙰 𝙻 𝙸 𝚃 𝚈. I like this, and despite the fact that I contributed to only a small fraction of its word count, I do feel that I helped lead it to something good. The Containment Procedures, believe it or not, were actually difficult to write. I got "Safe" for my object class, and I wanted to write ConProcs that would inspire my future coauthor, wouldn't force them into a specific direction, and would be interesting and memorable. My end result was short, but definitely checked off all the boxes I wanted. A physical site, to contain something they couldn't move, a conceptual site, to contain some kind of concept, and a mysterious third entity. Weird, perhaps difficult, but I knew a decent coauthor could hopefully do something good with it.

And I'm extremely pleased to say that I got much more than a decent coauthor: Yossipossi, the legend himself, had been assigned my ConProcs. And, according to him, he loved them. The ConProcs apparently matched well with his style of writing, and he was able to write up over FIVE THOUSAND words of raw, beautiful prose to match, carrying us to second place.

Now, I don't have much to say about the writing process for what was formerly SCP-5366, otherwise known as "The one that links to the brucebase wiki. It’s not like a major plot point or anything, but it’s a thing that happens." My coauthor was a person named "New_to_life," I got some okay ConProcs, and made a so-so article about a a researcher's mad efforts to discover the conspiracy behind a communist sunflower. Didn't even get 30 upvotes, but whatever.

Sadly, someone with a fairly large following made a Twitter post making fun of the title, and its score halved within a day. I decided that it wasn't worth keeping up anymore, and I self-deleted.

So there are plenty of progress trackers and achievement things here on the site, and I decided to just throw all of them into this one tab. Hope you enjoy.

Contest Entries and Rankings

I really enjoy the contests here on the site, and I've been happy to participate when I could! Here are the rankings for the contests I've participated in.

+ JamCon 2020 Rankings

+ CorpseCon 2020 Rankings

+ CanonCon 2020 Rankings

+ JamCon 2021 Rankings

+ (Unofficial) Creck Fection Contest 2 Rankings

+ SCP-6000 Contest Rankings

Achievement Badges

Badges from the SCP Achievement Badges page.

Certificate Of Attendance: Post an Author Page, add to a Collaborative Log, and participate in an Official SCP Wiki Contest.
Draw Me Like One Of Your [REDACTED]: Create an artwork page with a rating of at least +30.
Full House: Author of a main list SCP, a Joke SCP, an Explained SCP, a Tale, and a GoI Format all rated at +50.
Participation Trophy: Write an article rated at least +100.
Straight Out Of Central Casting: Create a character who merits their own tag and has been featured in works by 3 other writers.
Lore Expert: You've written at least 3 GOI articles and/or skips rated +50 or above.
The Medium Is The Message: Author of at least 10 media files (images, audio, videos, etc.) that are used on the wiki. Must be original works released under a version CC-by-SA license compatible with the SCP Wiki.
Look Ma! I'm On TV!: Have one of your works be featured on an off-site video, podcast, video game, etc.
Level Up!: You've been a member of the SCP Wiki for one calendar year.
Skip Tutoring: Have an SCP draft thread you gave feedback on succeed on the main list.
Extra! Extra!: One of your articles has been featured on the front page.
Distinguished Butterfly: Be featured on the Reviewers' Spotlight.
Secret Christmas Presents: Successfully participate in the official Annual Holiday Art Exchange, becoming someone's Secret Santa.
Pagemaster: Contribute icons or new achievements to the SCP Achievement Badges Page.

Badges from the Achievement Badges For Fun page.

(006) I'm coming!: First article (SCP/tale/GOI-format/artwork) posted after joining the site rated at least +60.
(007) "Even in this darkest of nights, I see…the moonlight…": Author of at least 3 SCPs/tales/GOI-formats rated +30 or higher, with each article containing at least one of the following scenes: […] Containment breach of highly dangerous anomalous entity which was previously contained by the Foundation. Eventually it was successfully re-contained.
(009) Step into the house: Author of at least 2 main list SCPs or tales that all rated +50 or higher, at least 2 001-proposal/GOI-format that all rated +60 or higher, and at least 1 artwork page rated +70 or higher.
(014) Happy to work with you: Wrote a co-authored SCP/tale/GOI-format together with 5 or more members. Rated +30 or higher.
(016) Teleportation: Used at least 5 different themes that fit the article.

Badges from the Foundation Cool Achievement Badges Page

Author Page Goal Table

This is the achievements table that a lot of folks use on their author pages. Will I ever fill it completely? Maybe.

SCPs
Write an SCP	X
Write 5 SCPs	X
Write 10 SCPs	X
Write 25 SCPs
Write an SCP tagged as "safe"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "euclid"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "keter"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "thaumiel"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "apollyon"
Write an SCP tagged as "archon"
Write an SCP tagged as "neutralized"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "explained"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "joke"	X
Write an SCP tagged as "esoteric-class"	X
Collaborate on an SCP	X
Write an SCP-001 Proposal	X
Write an SCP in Series I	X
Write an SCP in Series II
Write an SCP in Series III	X
Write an SCP in Series IV	X
Write an SCP in Series V	X
Write an SCP in Series VI	X
Write a format screw SCP	X
Tales
Write a tale	X
Write 5 tales	X
Write 10 tales	X
Write 15 tales
Write a tale that gets to +50	X
Write a tale that gets to +100
Start a tale series	X
Finish a tale series	X
Collaborate on a tale	X
Write a Parawatch Tale
GoI Formats
Write a GoI Format	X
Write 5 GoI Formats
Write 10 GoI Formats
Write 15 GoI Formats
Write a GoI format that gets to +50	X
Write a GoI format that gets to +100	X
Collaborate on a GoI Format
Write an Alexylva University Format
Write an Ambrose Restaurants Format
Write an Anderson Robotics Format
Write an AWCY? Format
Write a Black Queen Format
Write a Chicago Spirit Format
Write a CotBG Format
Write a DEER College Format
Write a Dr. Wondertainment Format
Write a Factory Format
Write a GOC Format	X
Write a GRU Division "P" Format
Write a Herman Fuller's Circus of the Disquieting Format
Write a Horizon Initiative Format	X
Write an ICSUT Format
Write an IJAMEA Format
Write a La Rue Macabre Format
Write a Manna Charitable Foundation Format
Write an MC&D Format
Write a Medicean Academy of the Occult Arts Format
Write a "Nobody" Format
Write an ORIA Format
Write an Oneiroi Collective Format
Write a Prometheus Labs, Inc. Format
Write a Serpent's Hand Format
Write a Shark Punching Center Format
Write an Unusual Cargo Format	X
Write a UIU Format	X
Write a Wilson's Wildlife Solutions Format
General
Get +200 net upvotes	X
Get +500 net upvotes	X
Get +1000 net upvotes	X
Get +2000 net upvotes	X
Get +3000 net upvotes
Get +4000 net upvotes
Get +5000 net upvotes
Get +6000 net upvotes
Surpass one Moto of upvotes
Enter an X000 Contest	X
Enter a Contest	X
Win a Contest
Write for a canon	X
Write 5 articles for canons	X
Write 10 articles for canons
Write for 5 different canons
Create a canon
Write a thing that does a thing	X
Write a spooky scary murder monster
Write a temporal anomaly	X
Write a ghost story
Write an urban legend
Write a mystery that gets solved	X
Write a mystery that doesn't get solved
Write something grimdark	X
Write something zany	X
Write a recurring character	X
Write a recurring author avatar	X
Write about a one-time phenomenon	X
Write about the Foundation being cruel	X
Write about the Foundation being saviors	X
Write about the Foundation's hands being tied	X
Write a humanoid	X
Write a sad article	X
Write a wholesome article	X
Write a confusing article	X
Write a disturbing article	X
Write a body horror article
Write a funny article	X
Write a 3000+ word article	X
Write a <1000 word article	X
Write a <500 word article	X
Write an article about space
Write an article about the seas	X
Write an article about a moral dilemma
Write an article with a lot of dialogue	X
Write an article without a story	X
Write a dado article	X
Write an article about a Series I SCP	X
Write an article that uses "The Listpages Thing"	X
Write, crit, and post an article within 24 hours	X
Write an article that gets a full feature on SCP Café
Write an article that gets a YouTube video made about it	X
Write an article that gets a good YouTube video made about it	X
Write an article that gets covered by The Exploring Series	X
Write an article that gets covered by TheVolgun
Write an article that gets covered by TheeSherm	X
Had fanart made of one of my articles	X
Commission art for one of my articles	X
Write an article that gets to +50	X
Write an article that gets to +100	X
Write an article that gets to +200	X
Write an article that gets to +300	X
Write an article that gets to +400
Write an article that gets to +500
Write an article that gets to +1000
Write an article that gets to +100 in a week	X
Write an article that gets to +200 in a month	X
Write an article that gets to be the Top Rated of the Last 30 Days	X
Write an article that gets to be the Top Rated of the Month	X
Get an article featured on the front page	X
Write a Tag Golf article
Successfully coldpost an article	X
Complete Bright's Challenge	X
Create a new GoI	X

"You had me at the salad bar closing, and I slammed the +1 button at the minecraft account deletion."

— DrBleep, regarding SCP-4645

12:05 PM <Spooky_toxin> Calibri_Bold, oh wait yeah I remember those teeth
12:05 PM <Spooky_toxin> Calibri_Bold, they're nice!
12:05 PM <Spooky_toxin> They fit in your mouth

— Spooky_toxin, a.k.a. SoullessSingularity, regarding my teeth

"aka 'If Alton Brown and Wylie Dufresne wrote an SCP'"

— CityToast, regarding SCP-5559

"'Currently, the only known way of preventing SCP-001-J-EX-D-ARC-1 instances from viewing documentation is to erase it entirely, then place [REDACTED] or [DATA EXPUNGED] where it used to be. Alternatively, one can simply █████ ██████████ ████ ███ ████.'

This line, I feel, is the most iconic piece of -j literature on the site. Absolutely astounding."

—Marcelles_Raynes, regarding Director Bold's Proposal-J

"I wanted to downvote it when I saw the title because I thought this was gonna be cringe, yet upon reading it, actually managed to be slightly creepy and humorous. Take a +1."

— taylor_itkin, regarding It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Eldritch

"Glad to see the Horizon Initiative getting more content. I like the more "King James" biblical style that other Universal Texts haven't taken. +1"

— Iapetus The Acausal, regarding The Parable Of The Three Princes

"These are a great idea! I'd love to see some of the joint Foundation-GOI ones used in some articles à la Collab Con."

— Lt Flops, regarding Calibri's Mega Cool Alternate SCP Logos Page

"This is brilliant."

— Sherf, regarding SCP-LA-II

kinch — Today at 9:38 PM
If I see a font and I can’t imagine it being used to describe a feast for squirrels and a badger
It’s bullshit
Quote me on this

Calibri Bold — Today at 9:38 PM
Can you see Calibri being used in that manner?

kinch — Today at 9:39 PM
Yes

— kinchtheknifeblade, regarding fonts

"Criminally underrated! The dialogue felt a bit sharp at points, and the story as a whole could have used some tightening, but at it's core this was a very fun ride. The heist was engaging, the stakes were clear, and the GOI itself left me wanting more. It's a very cool idea for an antagonist group. I kinda' want to play with them in some future articles."

— T Rutherford, regarding SCP-6900-D

_cc author

page revision: 857, last edited: 24 Jul 2021 15:42

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Secure, Contain, Protect

Introduction

My Resumé

Other Links

SCPs

Tales

GoI Formats

Others

Co-Authored

Resurrection: New Faces Hub (feat. Grigori Karpin, Nagiros, and redredred)

SCP-5545 (feat. Yossipossi)

SCP-194 (feat. CityToast)

Foreign